epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

  • Mood:
  • Music:

Movie Reviews: Goodbye Christopher Robin + Village Of The Damned (1995) 👎👎👎👎👎👎

Goodbye Christopher Robin (2017)

Domhnall Gleeson and Margot Robbie star in this boring biopic which you need grim determination to get through. This was a useless endeavour. There is shellshock and a screaming birth. This movie was measured for adequacy and found wanting. The couple have a son nicknamed Christopher Robin who is raised by the nanny. The burk boring father takes ages to write Winnie The Pooh. The mother is treated as useless and expendable.


The Great Depression sorta happens. The whiny brat son gets his toys: a bear, a roo, a piglet, a tigger and a tiger. They are the toys that inspired the books. This was singularly terrible. An illustrator shows up. The son does not go to school. Deranged fans show up. There is a big fandom. The family are revered. Even if the mother is still disposable. These are ludicrous people. The fans will let no book pass unread. This was cursory.


This was particularly abysmal and farcical and unrelentingly boring. This was not fantastical. The family are weird and insular and they have clannishness. The son whines that his name isn't Christopher Robin – that he is called Billy Moon. FFS. The father is called Blue for some weird and never explained reason. The boy tantrums and does not grow up. The nanny gets above herself. The boy is a brat and gets her fired.


The father is a moron. The useless son is sent to school and bullies shove him down the stairs. Time passes and the son grows up into an even bigger whiner. WW2 breaks out. Why did the son fail the army medical? The father pulls strings to get him into the army. Did they not learn from what happened to Kipling's son? The father willingly traumatized himself. One doesn't care about his PTSD. The son goes MIA and then just shows up.


The ex-nanny married her man. The mother does not age. There is bad acting and no blackout. The kid deserves to be subjected to pure, unrestrained violence. Hollywood is obsessed with fathers and sons. The son had a boring life, apart from marrying his cousin and becoming estranged from his parents and refusing all the Winnie The Pooh royalties. Why was the nanny called Nou? The mother was irrelevant. The son's toys are on display in NY. 'Fleabag' was in this.


Best Lines:

“It's all in Plato.”


“Unaware of the mechanics of the thing.”


“I just fought in the war to end all wars.”


“I was at the Somme.”


“Ordinary decent folk.”


“Find something to be happy about.”


“Elegant means over 30.”


“Going somewhere quiet and decent.”


“Perfectly horrid idea.”


“Don't plead.”


“Terrible fellow...killing people....making the common people stand up for his rants.”


“A little world...a 100 acre paradise.”


“Nanny's real too?”


“Lots of cricket.”


“Strip, cough, over there.”


“Do stop talking about that blasted bear!”


“Best loved men in the country.”


~
Village Of The Damned (1995)

No.

Tags: movie review
Subscribe

Comments for this post were disabled by the author