The Immunity Syndrome
Spock senses the destruction of the all Vulcan USS Intrepid. Shatner acts as if he is locked in battle with John Malkovich and Christopher Walken to see who can ennunciate in the most mannered fashion. This was enjoyable flaming lunacy. Spock is coldly indifferent as the ship encounters a giant space amobea. There is real and imagined meance. If Spock felt the deathscream of the USS Intrepid, then what was the destruction of Vulcan like to him in the 2009 film?
The space being is inventively cruel. This was freighted with horror. The creature has a ghastly MO. This was glumly gripping. Heavily graven faces grimly intone. Kirk has charm and chutzaph. Leadership means nothing if you don't command respect. Kirk is respected even if Shatner is monstrously unpleasant.
There is no Sulu, Mr Kyle is at the helm. There is an ominious threat and consequently things go poorly. Kirk does all the emotional reactions that Spock can never show. McCoy is perenially morose. There are harmful consequences. Spock and McCoy bitch. Kirk, Spock and McCoy discuss penetration and bemoan the strange situation. McCoy's medical skills make him worth putting up with in this thrilling narrative. McCoy shoots Kirk up with stimulants. Spock bigs up the ship. This was harrowing for everyone involved. People are unshakeably loyal to Kirk in this good ep.
Best Lines:
“What are we looking for Mr Spock?”
“I would assume: that.”
“What is? That?”
“Prolong our wait for death.”
“I am asking how Mister!”
“We're all dying!”
“What we're maintaining our distance from?”
“Vulcan dignity.”
“Finest starship in the fleet.”
“When do you estimate penetration?”
“Unconditional priority.”
“Whatever awaits it.”
“Escape margain.”
“SHUT UP SPOCK! WE'RE RESCUING YOU!”
“Thank you Captain McCoy.”
~
A Piece Of The Action
The ship bother another pre-warp planet. Why was First Contact made with them 100 years ago?!? The planet was culturally contaminated by a ship called Horizon that left behind a book about Chicage Mobs of the 1920s. So the planet Iotia has adopted a planetwide 1920s Chicago style mob complete with mob wars as their culture. Oops.
McCoy talks of the old days and he, Kirk and Spock gawp at the popular tastes, customs and entertainmnets on Iotia. The inhabitants have defiance as Kirk wants to fix the spiritual pollution which has parasited the minds of the locals. The society is not empathetic just authoritarian. The book that caused all this was published in 1992.
The new civilisational narrative that has emerged will not be easily fixed in this non-riveting ep. This was not compelling. Trek fans had to put up with years of suspicion and vilification until nerd culture became cool. The criminals are an unexpected element to the crew. There are no hopes or expectations. Kirk has a heartfelt motivation to fix things. Kirk has creative and personal ambitions. Kirk wants to define the correct path for the promotion of scientific knowledge, or something.
There is talk of past tensions. When you go into space, you become part of this overall collective called humanity. Your culture is left behind. Trek has always been inspired and sustained by fandom. Guest actors shout all their lines. This was not an action packed narrative. This was relatively esoteric. There is derring do and Kirk is a righteous narrative and a dramatic antagonist. This ep was incompetent and pitiable. Kirk leads the people to their presumed destination. There are unscrupulous individuals. This ep relies on you finding Kirk remarkable.
Spock doesn't mention the mirror universe when societies based on moral inversions are discussed. There is no calm decency or explosions of co-operation and altruism just mass disorder. Kirk has no unshowy competence. He has to wear a stolen gangster suit, drive, stride on a table and talk in a silly gangster accent.
There are aggravating tensions and rolling crises. This was botched and delusory. Is the UFP a community of values? The ship has solidarity forged by common endeavour and sacrifice. The locals are pretty rotten people. But Kirk will force social reform. Earth had a flowering of brilliant technical achievement, at some point. The UFP must mean vast military commitment despite repeated claims that Starfleet is non military. The locals bow to inevitability.
There is no emotional course and undue attention to advanced tech. There is no wicked flair and Kirk and co are repelled by the locals behaviour. Kirk is increaingly agitated. No apparently idyllic future for the locals. There is no mordant wit and this was not splendid. Kirk's defintion of fair is bizarre. This ep was beyond the realm of realism. This ep is an oddity and conspicuously fails. You mainly recall this ep for Kirk's bad driving and Kirk striding on a table while scheming and insinuating.
Best Lines:
“Very long and complicated story.”
“Moral inversion.”
“Run along and play.”
“Your driving that alarms me.”
~
An Un-Birthday Present
Kate and her brooding inscrutability beats up alternate universe Beth. Kate has grave seriousness. Dougray Scott has been reduced to The CW. Mouse helped keep Beth locked up, something she overlooks. This was not mournfully elegiac. Beth was traumatised due to Catherine and Jacob's arrogance and indifference. Jacob does not not care about Beth or Alice. What a jackass he is. Mary mutters. Jacob has hubristic complacency and feels no ethical obligations to his daughters. Will Mary shut her mouth? Kate talks about 'Crisis'. Jacob is an incompetent idiot with no abiding affection for his own daughters. Mary soley tests viewers patience. AU Beth whines. There is a general lack of concern. Sophie is reliably terrible.
Sophie is deeply unpleasant and does nothing to improve her reputation. There is a maze of misery. Alice is mean eyed. There is more mumbling and Gotham is a calamity strewn hell. Sophie doesn't question where she is going with her life. She has many unlovely characteristics and a taste for controlling behaviour. This was intellectually unserious and Luke bores. Sophie does snippy commnets and this was not dazzlingly inventive.
The reverberating impact of Beth's abduction does on. This was seriously substandard and there are cold repercussions. This was faintly ridiclous. A poor kitten. There is no profound depths and Sophie has faux sincerity. One is exasperated by Jacob's lack of engagement. Beth was shown a photo of Jacob and Catherine's wedding and Mary was there. Kate wasn't. Beth knew she'd been replaced. Jacob abandoned his real family for a whore and her bimbo daughter. Sophie has hostile responses. Mary bitches. Will the brothel fodder just go away?
Sophie does vilification of Alice who is an abuse victim! Catherine deserved all she got. Sophie, Mary and the late Catherine are and were moral vacuums. This was all trivialities and ignominious. Alice cracked up in the basement. Where is Tyler? Alice escapes. Sophie and Mouse are interminable. Sophie is comically bad at her job that she stole from Kate. Surely events would have cost Sophie plently in terms of credibility. How will this show cope without Ruby Rose? I hope Alice ruins Jacob utterly. Jacob and Sophie plot to kill Alice. Go away Mary. Jacob doesn't care about Kate's birthday. Oh FFS.
Best Lines:
“That awful place.”
“Beth never made it out of the basement.”
“Already forgotten about you!”
“Stuffy stuff.”
~
The Curse Of Cleopatra part 2
Exposition. The comic relief guy shows up. FFS. An annoying bint annoys. This was so boring. There is a priest. There is talk of a cult. Die show die.
~
Nihilism
Dean dreams of Pamela as Michael rampages. Dean lives in imagined contentment. Piss off Sam, haven't you a barfight to get into? People sit around talking. Michael talks normally. Sam and Castiel are awful. This was awful. Sam can't act.