epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

Movie Reviews: Trick R Treat + Outlander

Trick ‘R Treat (2009)

On one Halloween night in a small town, various people have very different Halloween experiences.

Henry (Tahmoh Penikett of ‘Dollhouse’ and ‘Battlestar Galactica’) and his wife Emma (Leslie Bibb of ‘Popular’, ‘Iron Man’ and ‘Talladega Nights’) have a romantic interlude cut short when Emma is killed by a demon wielding a pumpkin lollipop.

Steven the freaky school principle moonlights as a serial killer until he meets his match.

Laurie (Anna Paquin of ‘True Blood’ and the ‘XMen’ movies) is looking for that special someone while her friends and older sister Danielle (Lauren Lee Smith of ‘Mutant X’) despair of her ever stepping up. But behind their stripperific Halloween costumes lies something very unexpected.

Shy tween Rhonda is invited along by the in crowd. She thinks she’s in for some fun but is the subject instead of a cruel prank that backfires most horrifically. Luckily for Rhonda she knows her Halloween lore and the correct pronunciation of Samhain.

This was very good apart from the weakest part of the film where grumpy old Mr Kreeg (Brian Cox) gets a visit from Sam, the Halloween demon. This film had more fun, wit, scares and zest then the tired ‘Zombieland’.

Best Lines:
“I am not wearing this. It’s too small, my tits keep popping out.”
“That’s the idea.”

“This is the one night that the dead and all sorts of other things roam free and pay us a visit.”

“It stinks like a dead whore out here.”

Outlander (2008)

Iron Age Vikings + Alien Dude vs Monster.

Kainan (Jim Caviezel) who is an alien crash-lands in Norway in 709 AD. There he encounters the natives King Rothgar (John Hurt), Wulfric, Gunnar (Ron Perlman) and Freya (Sophie Myles.)

Earth is an abandoned seed colony so Kainan can use a gadget to download the language and customs into his brain. This is a good thing as he can warn the idiot, hostile Vikings that a nasty CGI monster on his ship is now on the loose eating people, cos it’s evil and that.

An Irish missionary rants, Freya shows off her 21st century style grooming, the Vikings act like football hooligans and Kainan’s face never moves, he gives no indication that he is sentient.

Even Kainan’s tale of what his people did to the monster’s kind doesn’t evoke much interest. Kainan gets a sword, Freya is carried off, Kainan decides to stay and bring about the Bronze Age.

This film is kind of dull and is not as camp as ‘Berserker: Hell’s Warrior’. The monster is off screen for most of the film. The script is full of empty space between a few violent scenes. There are plenty of shots of the landscape where nothing much is happening. The sense of déjà vu is over powering and it’s not just the ‘Beowulf’ homage.

Best Lines:
“This thing has carved out a territory and you are in it.”

“Give me my blade woman.”
Tags: battlestar galactica/caprica, dollhouse, gcb, movie review, person of interest, true blood
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