epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: Dracula: Prince Of Darkness + Alien: Covenant + Long Shot + Scared Stiff 👽👾👻🧛‍♂️

Dracula: Prince Of Darkness (1966)


Alien: Convenant (2017)

A colony ship flies around space a decade after 'Prometheus'. This was boring, incoherent and terrible and it killed the franchise. Poor dumb Shaw never had an adventure but was killed by the crazy robot. This movie is all Michael Fassbender all the time and a cruel twist ending.

Best Lines:

“A human being out there where there can't be any humans, a hidden planet.”

“Don't deserve to start again.”

“Not made to serve.”

Long Shot (2019)

A reporter (Seth Rogen) and the Secretary Of State (Charlize Theron) have a romance. The POTUS is a former actor who played the POTUS on a tv show. Lisa Kudrow shows up. This has a negative impact – it is so unfunny. She used to be his babysitter, he falls down stais and she wants to be POTUS. There is toxic madness. She becomes POTUS and they marry. This was terrible.

Best Lines:

“Time has not been kind.”

“The homeless person that fell down the stairs?”

“Do you have any grown up clothes to wear tonight?”

Scared Stiff (1987)

A bimbo moves into a haunted house with a weird attic but people say there is no attic! A man explains the wonders of a thing called diskettes. The same man is a patronising sexist stepfather to be. Bones are found and shrugged off. The stepfather to be is his fiancee's former shrink! FFS! He's also abusive and possessed. The acting is bad. This was a medicore time passer.

Tags: dracula, movie review

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