epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

  • Mood:
  • Music:

Movie Reviews: Spiderman: Far From Home + Freaks Of Nature + Believer + 2 others 😥😥😥😥😥😥😥

Spiderman: Far From Home (2019)

Tom Holland, Samuel L Jackson, Cobie Smulders, Jon Favreau, Marisa Tomei and Jake Gyllenhaal star in this tiresome tiring Marvel movie. The po faced and boring regulars meet Mysterio, a new hero who soon takes a dark and dissolute turn. Tony Stark's ass is licked by all in this faux profudity. This has no bland efficiency.

This is full of petty and poignant betrayals. I felt inexhaustible derision for this. Mysterio's goals are misaligned with Spider-Man's. This display of sloth bores. Mysterio eases people into doom and his ambition runs fierce and deep in this illogical nonsense.

This was less lovely and a familiar face from the Sam Raimi films returns. Sadly this film was done in a horribly boring way. Spider-Man will draw unfavourable notice. This was clearly ludicrious. You look at what people are doing on screen and ask: that's acting to you? I can't find anything to like about Peter Parker. Spider-Man does dumb things for reasons only known to the voices in his head. Nobody has a reasonable calm response to anything.

Mysterio doesn't ooze threat in this haven of lunacy. Spider-Man faces a grim future. I could care less. This is worse than the Andrew Garfield years. This was stupendously inept. Peter is increasingly unlikeable and smirkingly entitled. There is no philosophical complexity. People think Peter is a male escort. He has many horrible aspects and this is never remotely believable.

Best Line:

“Avengers level threat.”

Freaks Of Nature (2015)

This was full of barely contained madness. A town full of zombies, werewolves and vampires is invaded by aliens. A teacher is a howling madman. There is no suprising pathos just endless horrible sexism. People are tools and make the worst possible choices. This was vile.

Best Line:

“The entire town is murdering each other.”

Believer (2017)

This documentary is not endlessly fascinating. A rock star (of Imagine Dragons) did this documentary about the attiudes of the Mormon Church and its enforced moral codes. This is a grim process. There is no grip factor in this awful joyless film. People are unsupported and sad.

Best Lines:

“Beyond God's love.”

“Not ours to change.”

“Not all Mormons react kindly to that.”

“What's so wrong with me that I can't have friends?”

“Stupid looking dude.”

“Faith crisis.”

“Ethical destiny.”

The Little Girl Who Lives Down The Lane (1976)

Jodie Foster and Martin Sheen star in this sleazy tale which is a disappointment with no obvious purpose.

Murder In Mexico (2015)

A tue crime tv movie. A cheating man and reality show maker killed his wife. This was okay.

Tags: movie review

Comments for this post were disabled by the author