epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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STDS9 5x25&5x26 + Defenders 1x03-1x07 + The Handmaid's Tale 3x05 Reviewed 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

In The Cards

Jake and Nog have a whacky adventure. Humanity abandoned currency based economics for self enhancement. Kai Winn lurks. Jake wants a baseball card for his father. Weyoun lurks. A nutter nuts. This was overdone.

Best Lines:

“I'm human. I don't have any money!”

“Soulless minions of orthodoxy.”

“Vented into the cosmos like a bad case of gas!”

“Cellular boredom.”

“Cellular ennui.”

Call To Arms

Quark is a horrible sexist. The Dominion and Cardassia plan an attack on the station. Jake is a reporter now. Ha ha ha ha ha! The Romulans sign a treaty with the Dominion. O'Brien suggests a cloaked mine field. Bajor signs a treaty with the Dominion. Rom and Leeta marry. Dukat learns that the treaty with the Dominion is not in his favour but is too stupid with ambition to realise how bad it will get. Starfleet withdraws from the station. Dax says she will marry Worf. The Dominion take over the station. Jake's stupid. Weyoun sees Odo as a god. A huge UFP/Klingon fleet is seen. This was okay.

Worst Behaviour

Scott Glenn is in this playing a character named Stick. Matt is Jessica's lawyer. One has not had good experiences with the Marvel tv series'. Alexandra is the big bad. Elektra is dug up from her grave and she saw something on the other side; darkness. Elektra howls. Logic is unforthcoming. Where are the Avengers during all this?

Jessica transcends cultural norms and calls Matt a diversity hire. Jessica is so resilient. One can draw adverse inferences from Alexandra. There is bad acting and Jessica's evasive. Various characters meet. It's not an aggression free zone. Jessica would rather not be considered part of the mainstream. Jessica's emotional distance bores. Why aren't the Avengers gravely concerned about The Hand? Luke whines.

Danny Rand decides to stop fighting street level operatives and aim higher. There is more bad acting. Jessica's an idiot. Matt borrows Jessica's scarf. Everybody is kung fu fighting. Danny Rand is the Iron Fist, which is a glowy fist. The names are very porno. This was okay, this show is improving.

Best Lines:

“Next level dangerous.”

“Rip right through her to get to you.”

“Who's that?”

“Bad news.”

Royal Dragon

Danny is meanced. The Hand live by a fanatical ideology. Matt and his shampoo commerical hair broods. Matt's annoying, really annoying. A superhero team up is scorned. Matt does anxious consternation. What is the Black Sky? There are aggressive responses, enigmatic hints and delirious plotting. Alexandra monolgues. Jessica runs Elektra over with a car. Stick shows up having chopped off his own hand to escape. A poor bear is dead. Jessica lacks even basic insight. Baddies are incapable of being defied. The Hand caused Pompeii and Chernobyl. Exposition is uttered. This was dull.

Best Lines:

“You walk with her and I'll take you out myself.”

“Late. Or early, depending on your life chocies.”

“Your respect means nothing to me.”

“Don't follow too closely.”

“She set up a lot of murders.”

“Safer than we are.”

“They will disappoint you.”

“I'll put you in danger.”

“Who hears neon?”

“Karate kid.”

“Boy billionaire.”

“They're dangerous.”

“So am I!”

“God you're weird.”

“Define forever.”

“What are you on? Lithium?”

“Trains their fighters to be merciless.”

“The devil of Hell's Kitchen.”

“Devil boy.”

“Bulletproof, blind ninja, whatever it is you are.”

“Living weapon.”

“People with dark intentions.”

Take Shelter

I'm sort of wanting to watch 'Iron Fist' now. There is forced trauma. Jessica has more than a hint of irritation. She feels it her absolute right to annoy. Alexandra is entirely false. Jessica's combative style didn't endear her to others. The Hand attract an unparalleled level of resentment. There are ill judged intentions.

Danny's sidekick Collen doesn't do much. The unpleasant baddies annoy. Just because people are miserable doesn't mean they are interesting. Karen whines. This was not sinister or disconcerting. There was no deep thoughtful characterisation. This was unlovely. One has a pathological nostalgia for the 1966 'Batman'. How will this show be viewed in 50 years?

There is no emotional sustenance. There is gleeful instigation of evil and misery. Danny is in more peril. There is dramatic rooftop posing. Yawn!

Best Lines:

“Trained with the same monks that raised him.”

“I've traced it back to 1820.”

“That's all?”

“Dumbest Iron Fist yet.”

“I tried death.”

Ashes, Ashes

The idiots turn on Danny Rand. The idiots have delusional and paranoid beliefs. Matt lies. How can Matt afford an NY loft? Luke's smug. There is something 30 storeys under a building. Stick strikes. Elektra fights Stick, a one handed blind guy, and kills him. Danny's in more peril. Alexandra rants until she gets 2 sais in the back. Elektra is willingly evil. This was dull.

Best Lines:

“Lying psychopaths.”

“Let's not pretend to mourn this loss.”

“Crime fighting blind lawyer.”

“You can't have him.”

“You'll serve.”

“Before his allies come for him.”

“You work for me now.”

Fish In The Jailhouse

Has Elektra's accent changed? Misty annoys. Matt lies. Danny has to open a door. Jessica steals a homeless man's booze. Matt fakes being kidnapped. There is fighting, a drastic plan and dragon bones. This was okay.

Best Lines:

“Weird shadow organisation.”

“You sound insane.”

“There is no plan.”

“I can tell.”

“Mr bulletproof and super Joan Jett.”

“The Iron Fist belongs to us.”

“Raised to fight someone else's war.”

Unknown Caller

How is June getting away with mouthing off? Serena Joy acts in bizarre ways. June speaks to Luke. Why is Canada letting Serena Joy in to see the baby? The cassette tapes and recorder finally show up. An annoying spy bothers Serena Joy. Luke's stupid. Serena Joy passes Luke a message. Will Luke stop being so stupid?!? June's walking partner is knocked up, again. June reveals her baby's paternity. How is she not dead yet? This was terrible. Serena Joy and Fred want the baby back. Oh well done dumbass Luke!

Best Lines:

“Is he a man of faith?”

“Of course not.”

"Don't think about being clever. There are consequences."

Tags: handmaids tale, jessica jones, review, star trek

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