epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
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Movie Reviews: Scandalous Me +She Made Them Do It +The Taking Of Deborah Logan + 5 others

Scandalous Me (1998)

This is a bio-pic of Jacqueline Susann. She has health issues and an afflicted child. She writes 'Valley Of The Dolls' and other stuff. They make the 'Dolls' movie. Her husband supports her. This was soulless and causes disenchantment.


Best Lines:

“Do I care? Yes.”


“Me and God on the same bestseller list.”


“Unpublishable trash.”


~
She Made Them Do It (2013)

Steve Bacic of 'Andromeda' and 'Blade: The Series' and Jenna Dewan Tatum of 'Supergirl' star in this true story tv movie. This is based on the Sarah Jo Pender case. Is there compelling evidence that she commited a crime or ensnared others in bad beaviour? Did she cajole and encourage her boyfriend to murder their unwanted roommates?


There is no moral clarity after 2 people were shotgunned to death. Sarah Jo Pender (Dewan) and her boyfriend have very fast trials and she gets a 110 year sentence, more than he got! What future gain did she expect? Sarah Jo is living in a state of stress and confusion in prison and seems regret free. Was she involved in the murders or not? Did the trashy roommates provoke retaliation? Sarah Jo pays social penalties and she makes even more really bad life choices. Sarah Jo advises her fellow jail inmates on law and deals drugs and poisons an inmates. Time passes unclearly and she seduces a guard. The guard helps her escape and yet informs on her to the US Marshals pretty quickly. A US Marshal (Bacic) screams and looks cute.


When did Sarah get time to do her eyebrows and wax her legs and bleach her hair after escaping? After even more really bad life and friend choices she is recaptured and has apparently been in solitary ever since. Her own dad informed on her! Was she intending to harm people? This was okay but one still has no idea who Sarah Jo Pender is.


Best Lines:

“I want them gone.”


“I want this crap out of my house.”


“Shut your bitch up!”


“Eat me.”

“In your dreams.”


“Like a female Charles Manson.”


“Don't ask no stupid quesitons.”


“The chemical closet.”


“Reasonable innocence.”


“A system that won't admit it made a mistake.”


“I'm not going to grow old in this prison.”


“Distancing phrases.”


“Hunted woman.”


“Never liked the word no.”


“Very popular with the other offenders.”


“Half the girls at Rockville have stripped there.”


“Gets ordinary people to do horrible things.”


“Ex con stripper.”


~
The Taking Of Deborah Logan (2014)

This found footage horror sees people film a PhD thesis film about an Alzheimer's patient. Things get violent, loud and stupid. The characters are wilfully inattentive to sense in this under-lit movie. This was aimless and generic. Deborah is self-annihilating and there are harbingers of future change.


There is no subtlety of characterisation or acuteness of psychological insight. This was not surreal, eerie or ambiguous. This causes a paucity of interest. This is shallowness that lacks dramatic, emotional and intellectual weight.


There is no righteous indignation at the moral and ecological failings of humanity. This was dull. There is no self-reckoning. This was an imaginative failure. There is no narrative inventiveness. Deborah terrorises, injures and psychologically maims people. This has no gravity. People simply refuse to accept sense. This was not refreshingly compelling.


Deborah unleashes a torrent of attacks and the ferocity of them grows. Deborah causes concern. There is causal, grim violence. This was not alluringly strange or emotionally or intellectually engaging. There is possession and no palpable dramatic stakes. There are hate filled features and horrific violence and a twist.


Best Lines:

“Logical thought.”


“Nailing the windows shut again.”


“Night scamper.”


“Beyond reason.”


“Fell into madness.”


“The bitch leviated onto a counter!”


~
Army Of Darkness (1992)

Bruce Campbell stars as Ash who has somehow time-travelled. Why is there a chainsaw in the past? An annoying bint annoys and judges Ash. This is increasingly awful and there is shagging and blood.


~
Tales That Witness Madness (1973)

This was truly awful and not bafflingly odd. This anthology horror has a tiger, time travel and Donald Pleasence and Joan Collins and Kim Novak and a man in love with a tree stump. This was uninspired and hilariously bad.


~
The Wife (2017)

This is not a tale of ferocious defiance. Glenn Close is a martyr to her Noble Prize winning writer husband (Jonathan Pryce). They fly on Concorde to Sweden. What year is this emant to be? Christian Slater lurks. This was ghastly and everyone is a sexist malicious idiot. This was absolutely abysmal and excruciatingly bad rank stupidity. The couple have a malignant useless son (Max Irons). Close seems hysterically tense and none of her choices make any damn sense.


There is no emotional impact. There are flashbacks to 1958 on. Why does she love him? What happened to Pryce's first wife? Elizabeth McGovern shows up in flashback. This never dramatically intensifies and the 'twist' is exactly what you think it will be.


Best Lines:

“Perfectly justified rejection.”


“Endless list of the prosaic.”


“Turning your appalling beahviour into literary gold!”


“Malign Joe's talent.”


“Worshipful to me.”


“This is my life, god help me.”


~
Snowpiercer (2013)

Chris Evans and Tilda Swinton star in this scifi drama set on a train. An attempt to fix global warming froze the Earth and caused mass extinction. The train is an ark. What do they eat? How do they maintain the tracks? It's 2031 and how is there steak? Where do the clothes come from? This was ludicrous. Stupidity has a terrible legacy in this film. I remain to be convinced of this film's relevance. The upper classes stoke fear in the lower decks. Chris Evans is one of those who don't want to grovel in front of Swinton's power anymore. It's helpful that there's no bullets after the last revolt. Or are there? This was sadly mind-bogglingly banal. John Hurt, Jamie Bell and Octavia Spencer co-star.


Best Line:

“They couldn't take the engine.”


~
Captain America (1990)

Steve Rogers becomes a super solider. Red Skull looks like a dude in a Halloween costume. This looks cheap. Cap is frozen, there is a montage of time passing and Cap is played by the son of the man who wrote 'Catcher In The Rye'. Darren McGavin, Bill Mumy, Michael Nouri, Scott Paulin and Ned Beatty co star. A white saviour eco-warrior becomes POTUS. Cap wakes up in 1993. There's no Peggy Carter but there is a Sharon. She shows Cap the wonders of VHS. This was so very mediocre.


Best Line:

“Sick bastard.”

Tags: movie review, supergirl
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