epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

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Movie Review: Underworld: Blood Wars (2016)

The 5th movie. Selene runs, her lover and child are lost to her. Aren’t vampires and lycans public knowledge now? The outcast pariah Selene is hunted by vampires and lycans. A new lycan leader looks for Eve and Selene. Theo James as David the hot vampire shows up to be hot and brooding.

Charles Dance prances. Tobias Menzies plays the new big bad. Vampires are now allergic to nightshade. Dance dies. The vampires hunt David and Selene. David and Selene are immune to sunlight. The question of David’s mother is brought up. David and Selene head to the northern fortress full of peaceful vampires. A vampire shags the werewolf big bad.

David is royalty. Selene rises from the dead like the vampire messiah. Her loverboy died at the hands of the rent boy looking werewolf big bad. There are fights, lots and lots and lots of incoherent fights. Selene rips out the big bad’s spine. A 6th movie is set up. This was dull.

Best Lines:
“My coven, my daughter, my love, all gone.”

“I hope she remains lost.”

“Grunt if you understand.”

“Their final sanctuary.”

“I was willing to settle for competence.”

“The promise of what is yet to be.”
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