epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: Pilgrimage + The Hound Of The Baskervilles + Fallen (2016)

Pilgrimage (2016)

Richard Armitage, Jon Bernthal and Tom Holland star in this this Irish film. It is 1209 AD and this has a relic, Norman knights with threatening natures, subtitles, stone huts and plain song. The relic is ordered to Rome for an upcoming Crusade. The monks hid the relic in a hole. Armitage broods as a nasty Norman knight. A mute (Bernthal) lurks. There are storms and people talk about Norsemen.

Where did the fine gold box come from that the relic was kept in? There is a mention of the shee. There is fighting, death, pagans, drool, betrayal and Armitage hacking up a bush. There are also uneasy secrets and layers of tension. The Mute and Armitage have a brawl on a beach. Armitage waves a plastic looking mace and the Mute speaks and bites out Armitage's throat. A monk has plans and the relic heads into the briney deep. This was okay and the ending is open.

Best Lines:

“It is not our place to ask why.”

“You do not know what you ask.”

“Dark days for the faithful.”

“Jerusalem has been lost for 20 years.”

“The lucky ones would have died in their bed.”

“Their souls would know no rest.”

“You are damned.”

“The doors of salvation will be forever closed to you.”

“This accursed country!”

“Save us!”

Sherlock Holmes: The Hound Of The Baskervilles (1983)

Ian Richardson, Denholm Elliot, Glynnis Barber, Brian Blessed, Martin Shaw and Connie Booth star. Oddly Shaw is dubbed by a Yank. There is bad ADR, hysterical maids, idiocy and Blessed shouting all his lines. Watson is a fool and it's all resolved. This bored.

Best Lines:

“Evil goddless men.”

“Ghosts do not send letters.”

“Seen things no sober man has.”

“Leave this dreadful place.”

“Rot! Rot!”

“I don't like anything about you sir.”

“That butterfly catcher!”

Fallen (2016)

This okay movie was based on a crap YA novel. A girl is sent to a special school where various awful boys bother and gaslight her. There is exposition and Joely Richardson is the only name star though Lola Kirke of 'Gone Girl' does play the heroine's friend Penn.

The school is called Sword And Cross and is full of weirdoes. There is divine cruelty. Various scumbros bother Luce the heroine. People lie. Appealingly loopy mythology is spewed. There is more exposition and deliberate efforts are being made to hide the truth.

Angels fly and there is sap. Luce has no agency. Penn dies. Luce causes violent disorder. There is emotional coercion and this was OTT yet cheap looking. The love interest gets impunity for his lies and deception.

Best Lines:

“Gang related items or clothing.”

“Search for vidoes of sneezing hedgehogs.”

“I won't let you take her to Lucifer!”

“You are the real curse!”

“Life that was supposed to be mine.”

Tags: movie review, the walking dead

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