epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Castle Rock 1x08-1x10 +Orange Is The New Black 1x05 +Charmed 1x06 Reviewed

Past Perfect

A couple run a Bed & Breakfast. Jackie talks. There are completely negative and unyielding attiudes. Henry was called The Black Death in school? Henry is a jerk. This was really awful. There is an axe, a sighting of Salem's Lot and this was aggressively earnest.

Best Line:

“Know your axes.”

Henry Deaver

We see an AU Castle Rock where the kid is from. He markets brain implants that cure dementia. The kid used to be normal and says he is the victim of a misunderstanding. As a child Henry ended up in the AU Castle Rock. Which he doens't recall. There is a very very very bad situation. The people of Castle Rock are always in the grimmest situation.

AU Molly fell down. There was emotional distress and bad conduct. Who was the woman with the knife? Can the kid go home? The plot is generally baffling. The kid was found by the warden and the Sheriff and was locked up and universally derided for no reason. This was as unmemorable as possible.

Best Lines:

“One terrible day. God answered.”

“Feline cognitive dysfunction.”


Ruth lurks. Henry and AU Henry are frightened about what the future holds. Events are unlikely to make them any more popular with their critics. The kid didn't deserve global oppribum and had no homicidal glee. There is a chasm between the image of the kid and reality. Ruth's accent seems to change. There is no unique horrific quality. Why did the guard commit dark violence?

This was horrendous, horrendous. The Reverend (in both worlds) was paranoid, incoherent, destructive and pathetically and relentlessy self-destructive. Dead birds are seen. This was all improbabilities. There are life-defining crises whose relevance is not immediately made obvious. Henry's son wanders. The Shawshank warden wanders incoherently and claims her predecessor was right.

Henry did try to kill his crazy dad. Prisoners riot and murder people but it is shrugged off. There is a time jump. WTF? How did Henry get the kid back into his cell? What happened after the riot? The kid is in a cage under Shawshank and Henry is his keeper. Is Henry the evil one? WTF? Jackie babbles.

Best Line:

“Like pure.”

The Chickening

Piper sees a chicken. People are sleazy. The chapel is smashed up. There's a mad chicken hunt and a bad mom. This was not good.

Best Line:

“I'm eating oysters bitches!”

Kappa Spirit

Tradge. The sorority bitch is haunted. The sisters are selfish. One sister has darkness inside her. No.

Best Line:


Tags: castle rock(tv), review

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