epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
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Movie Reviews: The Signal +Sausage Party +Escape Room +The Forger +Lethal Obsession

The Signal (2014)

Brenton Thwaites of 'Titans' stars alongside Lin Shaye in this lacklustre film. The characters will never experience happiness again. Why is Nic (Thwaites) on crutches? People go on about EBEs. Nic drools. Laurence Fishburne is an apparently smug scientist. There are acts of defiance and this is a collective experience of WTF. This goes badly wrong and is a dismal failure.


Best Line:

“Came looking for me.”


~
Sausage Party (2016)

This bawdy Seth Rogen cartoon spoofs Pixar movies. This was strangely admirable in places but terrible in others. Sentient supermarker food and products wait to be bought, at least until they find out what happens after they leave the store. This was funny in places and there is an evil villain. The ending is sinister and a wad of gum acts like Stephen Hawking. There is an extremely disturbing food orgy and a sequel hook. James Franco, Jonah Hill, Salma Hayek, David Krumholtz, Danny McBride and Edward Northon do voice acting.


Best Lines:

“Celebrating your doom!”


“Date with oblivion!”


“Control your insolent bun.”


“Unparalled sin.”


“I am to be trusted.”


“Tell stories of your idiocy.”


“Lifted the veil of non-reality.”


“Commited pizza genocide!”


“Crotch felony.”


“Devil food!”


~
Escape Room (2019)

Deborah Ann Woll of 'True Blood' and Tyler Labine of 'Reaper' feature in this okay horror which is like the 4th film to bear this title. A mismatched group respond to a mysterious black box invitation that leads them to a mysterious Chicago tower block. Various trope characters (math whizz, a burnout with limited prospects, an Iraq vet with PTSD, an executive, a miner and a nerd) must escape the escape rooms. This was okay if not super-effective and it seems to have 3 tacked on ending.


Best Line:

“Breathe, bitch!”


~
The Forger (2012)

Lauren Bacall, Josh Hutcherson, Alfred Molina, Billy Boyd, Scott Eastwood, Hayden Panettiere and Tricia Helfer star in this dull tale of a teen art forger.


Best Lines:

“I wonder what she's doing.”

“Probably taking drugs in an alley.”


~
Lethal Obsession (2007)

Kellie Martin and Dylan Neal star in this tale of a woman stalked by her cray-cray brother. This was dumb.

Tags: babylon 5, movie review, reaper, true blood
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