epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

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Babylon 5 3x08&3x09 + The Exorcist 2x03-2x05 + Slasher Guilty Party 2x03&2x04 Reviewed

Messages From Earth
Jealous astonishment reigns as Marcus gets the thankless Ivanova fresh eggs and bacon. There is slo-mo and IPX is mentioned. Nobody ever bothered to look into IPX. There is dated VFX. EA found shadow ships on Mars and Ganymede. This tries so hard to be cool. There is bad acting and Zack’s fed up. Delenn baby talks. Sheridan claims Earth is turning fascist. It already is fascist!

Who was the poor bastard put into the shadow ship? Sheridan plans to take the White Star to Jupiter and destroy the shadow ship. Namely he’s taking a Minbari ship to EA space 13 years after the Minbari tried to commit genocide on the human race! FFS. Taste free, stupid and moronic.

Ivanova is rude to Marcus. Why is she such a bitch to him? Why does Delenn know so much about shadow ships? I detest Delenn. What is interlac? Marcus draws a chart for Ivanova. EA declares martial law. This was dumb.

Point Of No Return
An overacting Minbari tells Londo that the EA has declared martial law. Clark dissolves the senate. Hague is killed off, off-screen for daring to guest star on ‘DS9’.  What did Sheridan’s 1st wife do during this period? The late Centauri Emperor’s 3rd wife (Majel Barrett, yes that Majel Barrett) visits. Sheridan caused all this. The word hell is uttered a lot. The 3rd wife is a prophet. Exposition is uttered. Zack is bullied by Nightwatch.

There is really bad acting and hypocrisy. The Nightwatch get security powers. There are riots on the station. The command staff and G’Kar harass Zack. Nightwatch are got rid off. Londo is told prophecy and that he will be Emperor and Vir is told that he will be Emperor. Sheridan is a smug liar and G’Kar is tired of being lied to. This tries so hard but the bad acting and rampant smugness does not help.

Best Lines:
“Holed up in their offices. Refusing to leave.”

“Clark just opened fire on the Senate building.”

“Urging citizens to surround the Senate in a living barrier.”

“Please escort him elsewhere.”

~
Unclean
A bald cat is seen and it is safe. Demons puke blood and then die in CGI flames. Zuleikha Robinson joins the cast. Groan. John Cho digs a big hole. I feel no heart-rending sadness for the foster kids. Manny Coto is involved with this show. There is disharmony in the foster house. I wish Verity would shut up, she’s a twit. Verity makes snide remarks. I wish Rose the social worker twit would leave.

Verity is not particularly pleasant. John Cho runs a group home. Tomas dreams. Morally dubious people lurk. There is brute force and trouble is instigated. John Cho is locked in crisis. Verity causes challenging interactions and has signs of discontent. There are changes, uncertainties and tensions. There is a mention of Chris McNeil.

John Cho seems emotionally numb. There is projectile vomiting and unease is amplified. This was stark and tragic. Rose has left the island and is at a ‘possessed’ girl’s house. She isn’t possessed. John Cho does an impression of a beached carp. A mother indulges in medical abuse. The abused non-possessed girl heads to John Cho’s group home. It turns out the demons are possessing exorcists. John Cho doesn’t listen. This was mmmmm.

Best Lines:
“Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?”
“At the bottom of the page.”

“Having impossible knowledge.”

“Already dead. Or worse.”

“I GOT A BIBLE!”

“You’re not the sick one.”

“Close your eyes and don’t open them no matter what you hear.”

“I was wrong.”
“Which bit?”

One For Sorrow
Harper, the abused girl, arrives on the island. There is no considered thought. Demons do a defiant escalation. Tomas looks up his sister. She’s been the subject of attempted intimidation. Marcus poses in his vest. There are dead birds. Integration of demon and human can be undone. Grace is creepy. Marcus talks about vile agony. People mention odd stories about the island. Rose sluts. What is Grace? She’s not a child. What’s her malign influence?

Best Lines:
“There is no next move.”

“I owe you a growler.”

“The 3 bishops I roasted.”

“Something very wrong on this island.”

There But For The Grace Of God, Go I
Andy does a dubious defence of the non-existent Grace. Rose lies. Marcus gets a love interest. Andy has wounds and can’t disguise the tensions. There are tragic implications. Andy and Rose betray reason. The priests learn of a possible demonic possession on the island 50 years ago. Andy is under duress.

Where’s the kids bird? There it is. Shelby the religious kid worries. It behoves Rose to lie. The priests have phones. This is not a vivid evocation. Tomas is intensely committed. Things have gone horribly wrong. There is a sinister field. Marcus rants. Verity snots and gets beat up. Rose is awful. Marcus gets some. Tomas has visions of shocking brutality while sneaking around a foster home in the dead of night. Alicia Witt guest stars.

Best Lines:
“Creepy annoying priest is back.”

“Bar fight violence?”

“Wearing him like some cheap suit.”

“Didn’t drink or cuss none.”

“Crazy arse story.”

“Orphan bastards.”

~
Saint Sebastian
A guy once beat up a guy on the street. Dawn sneaks and lies. The dead girl’s body is in a box. Leslie Hope and her man candy talk, a lot. People plan to go for help. Noah is a violent loon who lies. There is death via giant screw. The gang are jerks. This was bad.

Best Lines:
“Pretty sketch.”

“They don’t believe anything we say.”

“That was almost plausible.”

Night Of Hunters
The gang cannot stop antagonising people. A new character shows up, is attacked, freaks out and falls down some stairs. Noah is tormented. A dead body is cut up and served in the kitchen. This was bad, with more death.

Best Line:
“Slut for carbs.”
Tags: babylon 5, slasher, the exorcist
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