epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Slasher Guilty Party2x01+Black Lightning (2018-?)1x01-1x03+Babylon 5 3x05+DS9 1x08+Animatrix (2003)

Six Feet Under

5 years ago, workers at a summer camp bullied a co-worker in a hellish scene and put her on trial for “being a nasty bitch”. Then they murdered her. They're racist and this action provokes a reaction. Time passes and someone is revengeful. They are awful people. Leslie Hope and Ty Olsson star.

The former camp counsellors go back to the scene of their crime which is now a yoga cult comune. The summer camp is isolated in the winter. Dawn a bitchy blonde is perpetually in a foul mood. The brats lied without compunction. Why are they still friends? This is not a searching exploration of vengefulness and shame. They don't have splendid awfulness and deserve their ghastly fates.

They have no remorse for murdering someone. This was not lurid just mundane. They've returned to the scene of their crime because someone is to build a resort on the old summer camp and they want to find and destory their murder victim's remains before developers find it. Nobody has found the body in 5 years. The smug jerks have no issue with corpse desecration, denying their victim's family closure and mocking the yoga cult as a Manson family like group.

The jerks also framed a man named Owen for the woman's disappearance. He's dead. They don't care. A man gets chainsawed in a sauna. No-one notices. The body has been moved. Peter says they should go to the police. They should have done that 5 years ago. A married ho is a whiny selfish ho who cheats on her husband. Peter sees the ho for what she is. The ho set the whole murder in motion and has no regrets. Noah is a creepy nerd. I don't care about their emotional upset.

An ex-con does philosphic mumbling. Nobody takes responsibility for their personal choices. The dead girl's bones are strung up. The ho is hit with a 2 by 4 and bled out. The gang are acrimonious. Why did the ho go out jeeping? The ho dererved to be staked out. There is such remoteness. This was all drably familiar. The gang deserve to inexorably head toward disaster. Peter cries. Susan shrieks. Dawn is a bitch. They are not willing to hear counsel, have a lack of concern, they don't care how they've adversely impacted people and shriek vitriolic comments.

Why did they treat their victim so brutally? They scream denunciations of character at each other. They deserve to die. Discord is sown. This was wholly implausible, flat and joyless.

Best Lines:

“I hear someone playing the banjo and I'm out of here.”

“Time we faced justice.”

“No-one's found her yet.”

“Trips over a skull.”

“You're a victim, that's how you define yourself.”

The Resurrection

A retured superhero (Cress Willaims) stares at the tv as the 100 gang rampage. The superhero disappeared from action 9 years ago. Platitudes are spewed, his bimbo daughter plays with her phone and this is SJW material. The city is in a precarious state. There is cultural chaos. The title card is okay. The former superhero is now a high school principle. He is also an Olympic gold medalist. James Remar is in this. The former superhero's eldest daughter is a med student.

The 100 gang have a dark reputation. The bimbo daughter goes to a 100 club and yet she is supposed to be a top student/athlete. There is a nightclub fight and this is polemical. This was unnecessarily unenjoyable. This was long and loud. There are many disincentives to care. The hero's ex-wife doesn't seem especially supportive. The hero wants to give his ex-wife re-entry to his life.

The hero is seen as a vigilante and is not socially approved. His ex wife looks anorexic. This leaves one pretty unethusiastic. The youngest daughter being threatened by gangbangers doens't create wariness. She shrugs it off. A big bad who tosses a guy into a piranaha tank lurks. The hero's family has a stalker. The principle is endlessly positive. Angry men wave guns. People are increasingly desperate. There is no civility. There is an attack on the shcool. This tries for unearned emotion. How does the hero have powers? He has a sidekick (who looks like Gary Oldman) and a lair.

The city is a cesspool of nastiness. The hero puts on a new costume which has LEDs in it. Why does he wear shades at night? Why don't his shades come off? Why don't the cops arrest the vigilante who is posing on the roof of the motel? The eldest daughter inherited powers from her father. There are bitter tensions and deadly consequences.

Best Lines:

“Some guy in a weird parliament-funkadelic get up.”

“Something to fear.”

“High class ass kissing.”

“Just stand there and be cute.”

“Set a good exmaple for other girls.”

“Talk real.”

“Their father's like black Jesus!”

LaWanda: The Book Of Hope

Jefferson takes on Lala. Jefferson's ex has wilful ignorance and is not thoughtful or reflective. Jefferson is stricken. The 100 cause consternation. There is a pretence of dignity. This was banality. It tries for cultural weight and smart considered commentary. There are garganutuan consequencs to messing with the 100. Things get a bit more volatile. There are combative encounters. There is wild idealism and subtlety counts for little. The ex whines and this is a grim business. The evil albino lurks and sneers. There is a dire situation. Lala exits the show.

Best Lines:

“Start taking girls out of church?”

“War for the streets.”

“I didn't know.”


“There is no damn addiction!”

“Looking for her daddy in all the wrong men.”

“Yes you can. You just won't!”

“I'm not normal!”

“You drinking now? At school?!?”

“I live the life that rappers talk about.”

LaWanda: The Book Of Burial

Who is Gambi? Tobias is the big bad. Arissa the eldest daughter does little of note. Who is Lady Eve? Clifton Powell guest stars. Why does Tobias' sidekick never speak? This fails rather spectacularly. There are less than competent people. Jefferson acts creepily to a teen boy. The city is riven by violence. This does not matter significantly. Henderson whines. A Reverend whines. People get shot in the pesthole city. The teen boy sustains a consequence. Nice going Jefferson.

Best Lines:

“Live with your misery.”

“You look like an Instagram ho!”

Voices Of Authority

Sheridan and co lie. Zack whines about his jacket not fitting. Delenn babytalks about the First Ones. Marcus lurks with his 90s hair. Draal overacts like a mad person. The opening credits are boring. Poor Marcus likes Susan but she treats him badly. Julia a fascist from Earth shows up and she vows to root out immoral conduct. This was pretty silly. G'Kar wants to be told the truth, people lie to him for no clear reason. People lie more. Ivanova is awful to Marcus. She steps into the Great Machine and pulls incriminating footage of President Clark out of her ass. Garibaldi is an ass to Zack, who is justifably suspicious of his bosses. Zack is sick of their crap. Julia leaves never to be seen or heard of again. This was not impactful.

Best Lines:

“Rides up back there.”

“Earth doesn't have homeless.”

“Filter them out at an early age.”

“Never return from Io.”

“No response can be too extreme.”

“I don't read Narn.”



Jadzia Dax is on trial for something Curzon Dax did, allegedly. Where is the JAG? Gregory Itzin and Fionnula Flanagan guest star. Dax is very calm and silent. Sisko rages. Kira wears a tacky plastic belt. This was okay. A dead beloved war hero turns out to be nothing of the sort.

Best Lines:

“Assume there is and then find it.”

“Then that answer is wrong!”

“Decades after his death they still mourn him.”

“But you don't.”


Animatrix (2003)
This collection of nine animated short films fills in bits of information before and during 'The Matrix' movies and digs deep in the history of the world of the Matrix. Now 'The Matrix' was good, 'The Matrix Reloaded' was incomprehensible and these animated shorts which are both prelude and companion to the movies are insufferably pretentious junk.

This computer-animated tale deals with the doomed ship that accidentally stumbled upon the thousands of Sentinels drilling towards Zion. One of the crewmembers has to plug in and drop off a package in the Matrix as a message to Zion. A prelude to 'TM:R' it looks good but what is with the animators and their fascination for half-naked woman wandering around in thongs? This was short and fairly okay except for the striptease swordfight.

This deals with how humans created androids, turned on them and how the androids fought back. This is unbelievably nasty in its depictions of the human/machine war and the grotesque aftermath when the humans lost. This was ugly nasty stuff.

Remember that kid who followed Neo around in 'TM:R'? Well this is his boring origin story. He was an alienated teen until he got a message and had to escape The Matrix. His way of escaping is to throw himself off the roof of his school, die and awaken in the real world. This was really problematic.

A man and a woman duel in a simulation of ancient Japan. This was dull and exists solely to show off its pretty pretty animation. Plus also features the woman walking around with her ass falling out of her thong.

A sprinter runs so hard he wills himself out of The Matrix. This was crap.

A woman (who is first seen with her ass hanging out of her thong) loses her cat and with the help of some kids tracks him to a haunted house. The house is actually a glitch in the Matrix programming and offers the kids who hang out there a chance to bend the laws of reality and generally have fun diving at the concrete and hanging objects in mid-air. Eventually The Matrix corrects itself. This was way too long.

This was pretentious and boring, drawn in overly arty style. This is about a PI who is asked to find Trinity. Makes no sense the more you think about the plot.

A group of people capture a Sentinel and plugs it into The Matrix. They want to turn it to their side. This is full of 'Yellow Submarine' like colour schemes and visuals and the ending rips off 'Bride of Frankenstein'. This was far too long and far too up its own ass. And speaking of ass, a woman walks around in a thong. This was a dull, boring, pretentious, boring piece of crap.
Tags: babylon 5, review, slasher, star trek

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