epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

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Star Trek Discovery 2x01 +Runaway/Calypso/The Brightest Star/Escape Artist +Sliders 1x10 Reviewed

Brother

MULorca's constant malevolent shadow and carefully crafted persona is missed. There is babble about the Cassini probe for some reason. The 'heroine' does exposition. Amanda is not blonde. Lil' Spock was unfriendly. Captain Pike of the USS Enterprise takes command. Tilly SHOUTS and babbles incessantly. Pike (Anson Mount of 'Inhumans') stays on. The 'heroine' is a contrarian who is not delightfully difficult.


A dude in a visor and another dude with a coal-scuttle on his head wander. No-one is too concerned with the fate of the real Lorca. Pike and his dated hairstyle slumps. So who is captaining the Enterprise? Thinking of Spock generates strong emotions in Michael, who is embittered. The crew get into another rotten mess. The turbolift looks ridic. The Enterprise crew are not warm and cuddly. There is a snot joke. Saru has contemptuousness. Tilly incessantly yaps.


Saru and Michael are adversarial. Things are unutterably dull. Michael, Saru and Tilly are needlessly antagonising. Nobody cares about the real Lorca. There's a potentially devastating sitch involving red signals across the galaxy. The real Lorca is apparently still stranded in the mirror universe without credit or recourse. Not that anybody cares. Why did MULorca want to go back to the MU? He had a new life! Nobody has a shadow of misgiving about real Lorca's fate. Tilly is a horrible cretin. MULorca is denigrated.


There is no more mushroom drive. The doctor who can't act shows up. This ep is a disincentive to care. What happened to MULorca's tribble and weapons room? Sarek wanders around in his bathrobe looking skinny. There are foibles and inadequacies. Sarek doesn't mention Sybok, his eldest son. The ship has telescopic cameras. Enterprise sat out the war. Micheal says they wouldn't abandon a Starfleet brother or sister. They've abandoned real Lorca! Michael snots. There are colour co-ordinated suits to wear as 4 people fly pods down to a wrecked Starfleet ship. Evan Connolly the jackass dies. Nobody cares.


Pike's pod and auto-eject is damaged. What are the things near the redshirt's mouth? They find the crashed ship with some survivors. This ep is utter tripe that is devoid of substance and has substantive flaws. A red angel is seen. What is it? Do TPTB even know? Pike is beamed up and somehow is back down on the crashed ship seconds later. What was the blue thing that wouldn't transport?


This was tedious, laboured and bloated. The story rejoices in going nowhere interesting. Michael has intransigence. This was not well-reasoned. I viscerally dislike Tilly. Discovery's viewscreen cracks and it gets an asteroid in the shuttlebay. Tilly goes on about dark matter. Pike puts on a Discovery uniform. It is said that the 'TOS' uniforms are the new uniforms. Pike is on about the source and intent of the signal. Pike sees one of MULorca's fortune cookies that is a horribel prediction of his future.


Where's Spock? There is a 'TOS' homage (holey plastic in Spock's quarters) and Spock's quarters look different. There is a 3D chess set and a message in Spock's quarters.


Best Lines:

“A thousand centuries.”


“Hit it.”


“Declaration of malice.”


“Starfleet's most prominant ships.”


“Terrain between us we cannot navigate.”


“The classified details surrounding your last one.”


“I'm not Lorca.”


“Wildly lame.”


“He was right. As usual.”


“Great reverance for his mother.”


“I will say fewer things.”


“Fly good.”


“Where's my damn red thing?”


“One of the most hostile environments in space.”


“Cry like a baby tribble.”


“We won?”

“There was a armstice.”


“You're an engineer, not a surgeon.”


“And I read.”


“Course I stayed behind.”


“On a collusion course with a pulsar.”


“This feels bad.”


“The power of math.”


“Wasn't one to encourage discourse.”


“An instrument of last resort.”


~
Short Treks: Runaway/Calypso/The Brightest Star/Escape Artist

These 'Star Trek: Discovery' shorts serve no purpose. Tilly has a stepsister? There is SJW stuff and then a man wakes up in his pants in sickbay. The Discovery will be empty for a 1000 years and it is hinted that the UFP warps. WTF? There is no emotional texture and this was not oddly compelling, just achingly serious. Will things go very badly wrong for the Discovery crew? These shorts are narcotising and cause a creeping dissatisfaction. They were not riveting or propulsive. There are no interesting implications. Saru's origin story is shown leading to an unexpected cameo. Mudd yells and there is boob armour, Orions and a call forward. This causes wry distain.


Best Lines:

“Got greedy and awful.”


“How could this life be enough for them?”


“Relics from the long ago.”


“What is out there beyond the skies?”


“Pissed off the wrong planetary alliance.”


“It trains you. For command.”


“How can I get?”


“Milk alternative.”


“Sugar is awesome.”


“Pre-warp society.”


~
Luck Of The Draw

The sliders get a dog and a new slider in the form of Ryan (Nicholas Lea). They are on a world where a lottery gives out money. Winners die as a form of population control in a world which follows the writings of Thomas Malthus. There is only 1/2 a billion people on this Earth. Wade is a lottery winner and is in peril. Rembrant meets and loses a woman. Quinn has macho scorn and gets shot in the cliffhanger. This was boring and the dog, Ryan and the gunshot wound vanished without explanation in season 2 due to network meddling. Which wasn't the last meddling that would damn this show (Maggie, Kromaggs and Charlie O'Connell are yet to come).

Tags: review, star trek, xfiles
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