epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: This Is Spinal Tap+Marilyn: The Last Sessions+The Simone Biles Story+ 2 others

This Is Spinal Tap (1984)

This alleged 'classic' has sterility and is sluggish. It is gruelling and portentous and it has unearned seriousness and it is witless. This was absurd and it was heavy with self importance and it is so so dismal. This was incredibly generic and yet Ozzy Osbourne said this was a worryingly accurate portrayal. This was sublimely stupid and woefully weak.

Best Lines:

“Died in a bizarre gardening accident.”

“Can't prove who's vomit it was.”

“Get out of the 60s.”

Marilyn: The Last Sessions (2008)

This documentary about the alcholic junkie who couldn't sing or act continues the bizarre obsession with the 'icon'. This was pretentious and talky and showcases only how Norma Jean loved to play the victim.

Best Lines:

“I'd like him to love me.”

“Actress of sex.”

“Sold what she could to whoever wanted it.”

“Provokved people to mistreat her.”

The Simone Biles Story: Courage To Soar (2018)

This bio-pic is so worthy and dull.

Best Lines:

“The chicken police.”

“It almost never happened.”

“She shouldn't be able to do that.”

Quarantine 2: Terminal (2010)

There is mumbling and a snotty kid in this terrible unwanted sequel to a terrible remake of a Spanish horror film. One is not massively enthusiastic about this sequel. A plane with sick people lands at a quarantined airport. There are rats, bad acting, blood and a cat. The baddie is awful and people try to shoot the poor cat because they claim it is infected. In the best part of the movie: the cat lives and got out of the airport. YAY!

Best Line:

“Earth could use a good plague.”

Night Of The Living Dead (1990)

Tony Todd waves a crowbar and Patricia Tallman of 'Babylon 5' proves she is a better stuntwoman than actress in this remake. Barbara (Tallman) says they should just walk right past the shuffling zombies. No one ever uses the term zombie. They yell and make noise and attract more zombies. They could have just WALKED out and been rescued like Babs was. This was okay.

Best Lines:

“A way out is a way in!”

“Organisms from space.”

“Behavioural disorders.”

Tags: babylon 5, movie review

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