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6 TV Reviews

The Haunting Of Hill House 1x10

Silence Lay Steadily
This is un-nuanced. Steven does moralistic sneering and does not deserve a redemptive finale. This was not wildly entertaining. Steven had dynamic conviction in his own moral foundation and sees himself as a moral beacon and sainted laureate. Steven has no sense of shame or moral conduct. There is no mythic aura. Hugh tries to ease the estrangement with his children. Steven put on a heartless display of crude negativity and false claims.

The atmosphere is chaotic and there are quality problems. Things are contentious. Why wouldn’t the Red Room let Hugh in? Steven has a problematic personality and an instinct for confrontation and constant drama. This was totally irrelevant and does not leave you entrenched. Steven sees himself as valorous. Steven sees a pregnant Leigh whilst under the pernicious influence of the house.

Steven is grossly abusive and insulting and ‘Leigh’ tells him what a loser he is. How did Theodora and Shirley get into the Red Room? This was facile. I hate Steven and his haughtiness and contemptuousness. Things get stupider. This was not cathartic. How did Luke not die from shooting up rat poison? This was not even enjoyably awful. There is no palpable unease. Shirley cheated. Shirley’s unworthy. There is mumbling and moral capitulation. This was dreary and routine.

People talk endlessly. The unchecked power of the house goes on. The Crains didn’t live their expected lives. One is not highly engaged with this. This does not have melodramatic abandon. Luke’s not a bad looking junkie. The Red Room is Hill House’s stomach. This was wholly inadequate. This ep was an absolute complete disaster. This was not forceful. The Red Room put on different faces for each of them. How was it a treehouse?

There is ire. Nobody listened to Nellie. There was sap and nobody meets ghosts’ eyes with fear. There is no desperate intensity. Olivia was selfish and nothing is remotely believable. Nobody cares that Olivia murdered Abigail. Olivia caused hugely negative consequences with her drama. Nobody signals clear disapproval of Olivia’s acts. There are no reasoned careful actions, fear or anguish. The family just leave the house in an eruption of sap. The ending is an ass pull cop out which is not innovative.

This was all dissonant twee sap. Hugh was unvalued. Did nobody care about the Dudleys loss? Nobody ever learned Abigail was dead? Ghosts are trapped in the house: Abigail, Nellie, Hugh, Olivia and Mrs Dudley. People keep stuff from women for their own good. Hugh was an idiot. Leigh forgives Steven and gets knocked up. Shirley guilts her husband into forgiving her for her lies and cheating. Luke’s clean. This was awfulness.

Best Lines:
“Picked up the cheque for your dreams. And I said goodbye to mine.”

“Toast apples in my own hearth.”

“I will have a robin.”

“The night sky is full of dead stars.”

“Walls don’t work that way.”

“Those who walk there, walk together.”

Bloodline (2015-2017) 1x01
This Florida family drama stars Kyle Chandler, Ben Mendelsohn, Enrique Murciano, Sam Shepard and Sissy Spacek. This has nice opening credits. A family black sheep (Mendelsohn of ‘Rogue One’) comes home. His kinfolk, the Rayburns, are a respected, loved and honoured family. The black sheep, Danny, is a slob who nobody likes.

One son, John, is the Sherriff (Chandler) who is respected. Danny is scummy and unwashed. The daughter Meg is cheating on her fiancée (Murciano). Danny is regarded apprehensively. Everyone hates him. There is another brother, Kevin, who is a dirty looking argumentative jackass. There is no hope for any of them anymore. This is not vivid. Unsettling family issues are hinted at.

There are secrets upon secrets. This was not ferocious. People talk about a pier dedication. This was not dark, dangerous, atmospheric, well-crafted or truly riveting. This was dull. The potential consequences of Danny’s return are obvious. Danny has cold bitter anger and outsiders find the family issues all too easy to overlook. Nobody has elation and relief at seeing Danny. His return is seen as an incursion. People spew hostile questions at him. Watching more is not a tantalising prospect.

The family get public praise. Nobody indicates willingness to get on with Danny. They’ve little desire to support him. Danny is mysterious. John finds a dead body in the swamp. The parents are horrible. Danny shows off his naked arse. John wants Danny gone and as flashforwards show that John end up murdering Danny and not caring.

Best Lines:
“He can’t get here by himself?”

“Bad dudes.”

“Get over it already.”

“Come back where?”

“They hate you man and they always will.”

“What we did to our brother. We had to do.”

“No good will come of this.”

Star Trek 1x27

The Alternative Factor
Non-existence is threatened. This ep was a troubled production and it shows. A crazy man rants. This was meandering and directionless. The man has dubious intent and is malignancy embodied.

Best Lines:
“The devil’s own spawn.”

“I fail to comprehend your indignation.”

Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina (2018-2020) 1x01

Chapter One: October Country
This tale of the half witch, half mortal Sabrina has nice opening credits and an overacting Richard Coyle. Sabrina had no friends in the comic but does here. She fawns over her boyfriend Harvey. The comic was set in the 60s but this TV show takes place in the modern day.

There is a mystery about Sabrina’s parents. A nice teacher (Michelle Gomez) is killed and replaced by a demon thing. Sabrina’s preparing for her Dark Baptism and needs to pick her familiar. There is talk of goblins and a mention of an Academy Of Unseen Arts. There is exposition and 3 sluttily attired witches harass Sabrina. The high school principle is played by Bronson Pinochet and he doesn’t care when a student is bullied.

Sabrina wears a very short skirt to school and wants to help her wailing friend. Sabrina tells Harvey the truth and then makes him forget. There is an unnecessary cousin. Witches eat humans and have wifi. Sabrina has spiders attack the principle. There are dreams and visions and apples and Salem the very cute cat shows up.

Mrs Wardwell or whatever she is now lurks and plots. Sabrina sets up a school club. There is mention of a witch hunter. Why are there apple blossoms and apples on trees at the same time? There is an evil maze. Why is the image blurry? Kiernan Shipka is good as Sabrina and she has doubts about following the path of satan. This was okay.

Best Lines:
“None of your necromancy.”

“Walk the path of night.”

“Broke sacred witch law when he married a mortal sow.”

“Stay with your own kind.”


“Blood curse.”

“Puritanical masculinity.”

“No gravestones, no monuments.”

“Sign my name in the Dark Lord’s book.”

“Bred for service.”

“Church Of Night.”

Supergirl 4x01

The American Alien
What is bizarro Supergirl up to? This was not memory making. There is still no Superman. Lynda Carter and her bad fillers guest stars. Sam has left town. Rhona Mitra shows up as Mercy Graves. There is no narrative sophistication. Alex has no positive attributes. This was not spectacularly good and had no particular narrative of interest. There is ferocious hostility to aliens. This was not massively entertaining.

Where is Max Lord? Nia some annoying bint annoys. Aliens are disturbingly unfamiliar. The POTUS (Carter) is revealed as an alien. There is no moral self-reliance and Alex tries for unblinking authenticity. This was slightly horrifying in its stupidity. Mercy’s brother Otis is captured. Mrs Luthor is visited by Supergirl - she just gets to barge in and annoy her and Lena. Supergirl’s all-bestriding ego annoys.
This was all irrelevance and not endearingly silly. This was not outrageously entertaining just stunningly bad. James can’t be Guardian anymore.

This was not morally complicated. Supergirl sees a hate site. This was received poorly and is desperate, terrible and ramshackle. There is no ironic potency. Mercy is viperous. There is no alarming drama, just false endearments, moody glances, wild-eyed calm, overtones and portents. Kara is bewildered and aghast. There is cultural complacency and no lurking dread. This tries for unearned emotional intensity.

Best Lines:
“Looks like a Tolkien fan.”

“Mask of enigma.”

“Lost so much of my family to prison.”

“That looked contentious.”

Berlin Station (2016-2019) 1x01

Station To Station
Richard Armitage and Rhys Ifans and Leland Orser and Tamlyn Tomita and Michelle Forbes star in this CIA drama. There are dodgy US accents, a bumper sticker in English in Berlin and the CIA hunt a whistleblower. What does an agent being processed mean? Ifans sleeps with a man for information. Armitage tries to seduce a courier but she ends up dead. There are dark suggestions and the whistleblower is revealed. This was okay.

Best Lines:
“Buy him a boyfriend.”

“Foreign agents rot in jail.”

“My parents demonstrated against your parents.”
Tags: berlin station, chilling adventures of sabrina, hill house, review, star trek, supergirl

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