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Movie Reviews: Cujo + She Led Two Lives + Stolen Innocence + The Endless

Cujo (1983)
Dee Wallace stars in this Stephen King adaptation. Jan De Bont is the director of photography. A cute little rabbit is chased by a Saint Bernard dog and then bats bite the dog. A cute moppet kid does cute moppet kid things. The mother (Wallace) has a bad haircut and an idiot husband.

Cujo develops rabies. His awful owners don’t notice he is obviously very sick. The mother is having an affair. Then she and her howling, tantruming, brat son get trapped in their broken down car in a remote location by the rabid dog. Heat stroke is avoided, rabies kicks in quick, the violent actions of the mother’s discarded lover are shrugged off and the sheriff is killed by Cujo. Was the sheriff meant to be Bannerman?

This was sadly boring. The mother smashes a window with a gun. Where they bullets in it? It may have been a distressing experience for the mother but one doesn’t care. The book ending is changed. There is no high level of public concern about a missing woman and child. This wasn’t acclaimed or disconcertingly severe. This did not interest.

Best Lines:
“Peeing and puking red dye.”

“You couldn’t set that dog on me if I was coming at you with a straight razor in each hand.”

She Led Two Lives (1994)
Connie Sellecca is married to Perry King for 7 years. After her father dies, she has some form of mid life crisis and becomes a bigamist by marrying her first love A Martinez. Patricia Clarkson pops up as her slutty friend. Would a bigamist really end up cuffed and tossed into a holding cell with a gum chewing hooker?

King talks down a huge blocky phone. Sappy dialogue is uttered. King is a doctor and there are contrivances and people going in and out doors like a French farce. This is overwrought soap as she does cunning manoeuvres to have her husband and her side piece at the same time. Life is one long calculation. There is dated fashion and she frantically tries to facilitate her sudden lack of engagement with husband number 1.

Husband number 2 isn’t inquisitive about her odd behaviour. This is unadmired. She likes of the emotional attention of hubby 2. Really ugly clothes are worn. Passion is polite and this doesn’t even arouse causal interest. She’s brusquely rejected when the truth comes out. There is bad acting and eternal shame and discomfort.

Best Lines:
“Any tattoos or gang affiliations?”

“It’s in your box.”

“Heels from hell.”

“This is my husband, this is my other husband.”

Stolen Innocence (2007)
A woman suffers a stillbirth and faces invective. She’s accused of killing her baby. People patronise and judge her and she’s the subject of withering focus. What happened to her baby? What caused its mysterious demise? This was not visceral. The heroine has perfect makeup at all times and never shows the side effects of childbirth. It all turns out to be part of a baby selling ring. The heroine fights to regain access to her baby. I don’t care.

The Endless (2017)
From the people who gave us ‘Resolution’ comes this boring tale of 2 brothers who escaped a UFO death cult who get a tape in the mail. They have to buy an old video-camera to play it. They use old phones and have a TV with a built in DVD player and VCR. When is this supposed to be taking place? There is mumbling and things get unspeakably grim. This isn’t as good as ‘Resolution’.

One stupid brother misses the cult and wishes to return and thinks their lives outside the cult are horrible. The other brother has a remnant of moral fibre. There are weird images and the brothers drink in a park looking shifty. The brother with selfish inclinations wants to visit the cult and harasses his brother into aggressing.

The duo visit the unaging cultists. There is a lot of talk and silent purpose in this socially irrelevant cult. Something lurks in the woods and there is a tie-in to ‘Resolution’. There is a tug of war with something. You can’t tell who is who. There is a padlocked shed and weird events. What’s in the lake? One brother lies. What lurks in the woods? There are reveals and an idiot ending.

Best Lines:
“Have fun with that.”

“I don’t know why we haven’t been able to make a living or make friends.”

“Combed full of gel.”

“That looks like a gun nut tweaker.”

“Retarded hobbit.”

“You drill a hole in your skull so you stay permanently high. He drilled too far.”

“The two of you smoke crack together and then would steal the red buckets from the Salvation Army guys.”

“Dickless poison Kool-Aid drinking Heaven’s Gate offshoot.”
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