epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

  • Mood:
  • Music:

Movie Reviews: Spooks The Greater Good+Crooked House+The Silent Child+Prince Of Darkness +1 other

Spooks: The Greater Good (2015)
So this movie means that ‘Spooks: Code 9’ isn’t the coda to the TV show anymore, in fact this movie negates the entire existence of ‘Spooks: Code 9’. Kit Harington of ‘Game Of Thrones’ is in this. MI5 boss Harry oversees a convoy which is attacked and a bad guy escapes.

Tuppence Middleton of Tormented’ plays a female MI5 officer. There are fake US accents. Lara Pulver and David Harewood of ‘Supergirl’ are in this. Harry visits Ruth’s grave, she died in 2011. Where is Lucas North buried? Does anyone care? Harry arranges things for ex-MI5 agent Will (Harington) to be brought in. Will is introduced by jumping out of a restaurant via the plate glass front window. That window jumping is never explained.

It is hinted that there is some sort of mystery involving the death of Will’s MI5 father, that plotline is dropped. It is more or less said that Will was around in the Lucas North era but was fired by Harry cos Harry is a jackass that way. There is mumbling and convoluted justifications for strife. There is death, gunfire, more mumbling and bad acting. Will and Harry whisper dramatically.

What happened to the dead MI5 guy’s cat? There is even more death. Harry uses Will ill. Nobody is emotionally sensitive. What is peoples motivating force? Harry has a detrimental effect on people. Does Harry still have a job at the end? Does Will? What did the escaped bad guy want? Feisty threats are issued. Will talks common. MI5 has terrible security and then it ends. This was okay if unnecessary.

Best Lines:
“Lethal force is authorised.”

“Marrakesh rent boys.”

“Too bloody arrogant to kill himself.”

“He told me what happened.”
“Did he?”

“The National Threat level.”

“Loopy cold war relic.”

“Might as well be wearing an MI5 t-shirt.”

“So that’s how they got to you.”

“The good ones tend not to last long.”

“Is the glass rated for assault rifles?”

“I’ll cut your baby out of her and drown it in a toilet.”

Crooked House (2017)
This UK film was supposed to get a cinema release but ended up airing on Channel 5. It stars Christina Hendricks, Gillian Anderson of ‘The X Files’, Amanda Abbington the ruiner of ‘Sherlock’, Glenn Close, Julian Sands, Terence Stamp and Max Irons of ‘The White Queen’ in this adaptation of one of my favourite Agatha Christie novels.

I loved the book but not this film, it changes things around. Max Irons cannot act and does stuff like touch quicklime with his bare hands. A rich old man has been poisoned and Max Irons has to find out which of his crazy family did it. He does bad investigating of the death. The main suspect for the family is the dead man’s younger second wife Brenda (Hendricks).

The dull Max Irons tries to individualise responsibility amid severe familial distrust. The family are morally degrading and choke on their lies. The family overact and are morally pretentious people. Sense rarely prevails in this film as morally void people are unintentionally melodramatic. There are dark ruminations and the characters are all scary blanks where people should stand.

The widow with bright red hair and pink walls is sad. The man’s children and grandchildren all live in a big house as the rock and roll era encroaches upon them. The bellicose family have bracing contempt for Brenda. Men have macho bravado and this film is patently ludicrous. Sense rarely prevails and no one does any real detective work. There is bad acting in this badly lit film. It is okay in parts but still utterly ridiculous.

Best Lines:
“Left the diplomatic for this.”

“Wasn’t so much Swan Lake as duck pond.”

“I hate stupid people.”

“A shotgun best expresses my feelings.”

“Why would anyone have cyanide in their house?”

“A Borgia living under this roof.”

“Near midget immigrant.”

“Very own Ruth Ellis.”

“I listen at doors.”

“Jot away.”

“Trained combat dogs.”

The Silent Child
This won the Oscar for Best Live-Action Short. A social worker (it’s Mitzeee from ‘Hollyoaks’!) teaches sign language to deaf child Libby. Her parents could care less. There are family secrets, rampant dysfunction goes on, Libby is consistently under-estimated by her emotionally distant clan and stripped of her life. The ending is depressing. This was okay.

Best Line:
“We have quite low expectations.”

Prince Of Darkness (1987)
This John Carpenter horror sees Donald Pleasence, Lisa Blount and some dimwits babble about quantum mechanics and discover that God and Satan are subject to flexibility of interpretation. There are horrific era-familiar fashion and grooming horribleness. Alice Cooper has a cameo as a hobo. A scientist and his students are called to a church by a priest (Pleasence) and discover It Is Awakening.

A creepy dude stares at and stalks a female student until she has sex with him. Ominous events like bugs and a supernova feature in the background. There is a BBC mention. The church has a jar of green liquid in the background; the green liquid is the anti-christ. It has been guarded by a forgotten sect.

There is mumbling, sexism and talk of the anti-god. There is staring, talking, homeless crazies and bugs. There is mutual discomfort and bad acting and exhaustive debate. This film is dull and an empty void. The homeless have a penchant for brutality and are morally corrupt. This is an unqualified repudiation of sense. There are conspiratorial worldviews and accumulated wisdom is blatantly false.

There are dreams and gay jokes. People spit fluid. There are zombies and death. The scientists’ moral superiority is swept away. People are harangued. There are no absorbing possibilities here. Mirrors are important and there is bad make up. This film is not tolerable and it has no emotional resilience. The ending is somewhat unsettling as it reveals a creepy dream which is actually a message sent from 1999.

Best Lines:
“Our logic collapses.”

“A secret that can no longer be kept.”

“No prison can hold him now.”

In The Line Of Duty: Siege At Marion (1992)
This is an okay TV movie about religious nutters.
Tags: game of thrones, movie review, profit, spooks code 9, the white queen, xfiles

Comments for this post were disabled by the author