Mommie Dearest
BD hangs out with Joan’s twins. Christian Crawford is mentioned as being in a play. Joan wants respectability. It is obvious that TPTB don’t believe Christian’s book ‘Mommie Dearest’ as this is dedicated to showing how Joan had a rough upbringing and tries to be a good mother. Meanwhile despite best efforts Joan and Bette are irreconcilable.
Joan’s aggrieved. They spitefully snipe and have downright hostility. This is breathtakingly acerbic and there are melodramatic confrontations. Joan is in wrathful mode. Do the twins have names? They are always referred to as the twins. Joan reveals she was abused by her stepfather. Hedda rants. BD can’t act. There is no profundity or deep affection and this was not piercingly honest. Women are self assured or not. They are also impugning, distraught and vengeful.
Joan and Bette routinely complain acrimoniously. This was not emotionally raw. Threatening language is used. The director needs extreme patience. Lange overacts. Bette hates Hedda and talks weirdly. Rough trade mistakes Victor for someone else. This was okay.
Best Lines:
“Bought myself a passel of brats.”
“Gave me ambition.”
“She’s adopted. She could be talented.”
“NOT YOU, BITCH!”
“Even that was almost convincing.”
“A cheap pig.”
“More sandwich?”
“This is what you give me?”
More, Or Less
Joan and Bette have no job offers. People think the duo have wrecked their reputations by doing a B movie. People mutter about the optical print and the director’s wife whines. People are mournful about the movie but the moral squalor makes it a hit.
Bette does terrible TV and the director is berated. Pauline is rejected by Joan. As for Joan she needs to be liked and desired and she is self-destructive and has a visceral hated for Davis and inexhaustible fondness for vodka. Pauline faces dashed hopes and Joan has no concept of self-denial. Frank Sinatra is a jerk, TPTB really dislike him.
Bette Davis spews worldly knowledge, Sinatra is a lower class lout and Gildhart Jackson guest stars. This was okay and full of believable reality.
Best Lines:
“Dinner theatre has become very chic again.”
“Hope his limo gets lost in the Mojave.”
“Toughy.”
“Chaw spit.”
“Match me.”
“Tits and fistfights and me looking like a real cool daddy.”
“Suntanned man-child.”
“You’re not the type that your peer group acknowledges.”
~
The Concrete Overcoat Affair, part II
Solo says he’s not Italian. There is repeated footage and Solo has to save Illya. Janet Leigh has no moral conscience. THRUSH rant about tuning forks. There are problematic utterances and this was not an extravagant fantasy. There is a catfight and this was not gentle or full of family and love.
The baddie utters dialogue calculated to cause unreasonable offence. There are wilful misunderstandings, unfounded anxieties, failed humour, severe preoccupations, mumbling and people who haven’t learned to live with what life has given them. Nobody gazes fondly at each other. One had an overblown expectation of this. Belligerent showdowns leave you discontented.
This was full of half-witted fools and blithering idiots. This much mythologized show was abysmal. There are no loveable foibles just reckless egomania. This was not done in terribly serious fashion. This was unimaginative and was not stark and mesmerising. This was overly self aware. Will Kuluva was in this somewhere.
Best Lines:
“You’ve got Illya?”
“What there is left of him yes.”
“I’ll cut you up like a chicken.”
“Unclean mind.”
“Sit around reading poems to each other.”
The Abominable Snowman Affair
This was full of endemic absurdities. The switch to full on zany plotting backfired spectacularly for this show. Illya dresses up as the Yeti. This was not alluring, Waverly bumbles and a pigeon flies. There are hostile circumstances and nobody is weary or wary. This was not thoughtful or joyous and people look meanly. This was fundamentally unfascinating blandness.
This was overburdened with self-congratulatory smugness and the immense ponderous weight of solemn significance. This was silly and pitiful and grubby. Dignity long ago went out the door. This was meandering, dodgy and morally questionable. This was not compelling. There was bad acting, morally dubious types and this was horrendous. This lacks narrative drive and nobody is delightfully amoral.
My Friend The Gorilla Affair
A serum, a gorilla, malign self involved types and a lack of dignity feature in this unentertaining ep. I disliked this intensely. Women are just decorative objects in this ep. Nobody has a moral purpose. Solo dances with a gorilla. A disgusting hunter gets away with all his crap. Solo plays charades and has no dignity at work in this ill-judged mess. TPTB had maladministration of this show. This was puerile and a moral failure and there is not moral maelstrom.
Best Lines:
“Your jungle briefing.”
“Jungle rot.”
“Snake mating scent.”
“Remove this blight.”
“Student of the grape.”
The Jingle Bells Affair
This entire ep was product placement for Macy’s. The innocent du jour ponders the discrepancy between one’s desired and actual level of social connection, or not. This has no considerable charm. A Balkan politician visits and nobody seems to recall that Illya is Russian. This is not heartbreakingly brilliant or creepily inventive. This season has many challenging aspects: mainly bad acting and a lack of sense.
The Take Me To Your Leader Affair
A fake spaceship flies around. Illya is abducted, again along with Nancy Sinatra. She wears ugly clothes and they sing a duet. This was okay.
Best Line:
“Would you mind turning around while I take the elastic out of my underpants?”
~
Doctor Who: Twice Upon A Time (2017)
Mark Gatiss (sigh) stars in this Christmas special that sees Peter Capaldi bow out. A solider from 1914 (Gatiss) sees a glowing thing. The Doctor (Capaldi) and his 1st incarnation prance around. Bill annoys. Where is Jack? Capaldi goes for it like he is doing Lear. People prattle about Testimony. There is exposition, over-acting, weird line deliveries and clips.
There is also sexism, no miserable desperation or grim satisfaction. There are bad VFX and this was not deliciously dark. Interest is discontinued, there is old footage and Clara. Groan. There are old faces and complete conformity to BBC tropes. This is not entranced by its own possibilities. This was terrible and impeccably dumb. As soon as the female Doctor shows up, the Doctor’s ring falls off and she loses her Tardis. Sigh.
Best Lines:
“Everyone else has fallen.”
“Walked in blood through all of time and space.”
“The nightmare of the seven galaxies.”