Joan (Lange) and Bette (Sarandon) make innumerable digs at each other. Bette has shallow charm and a vastly over-inflated sense of importance. Vile gossip columnist Hedda Hopper is unfreighted by conscience or remorse and has hideous, supercilious self-justification and a devotion to an invented ideal of Hollywood’s former greatness. Hedda (Davis) worships this mythic universe and hates the inevitability of change and so is a malign presiding influence over la-la land and loves the thrill of retribution.
Joan is described as a great movie star and Bette as a great actress. They only ever made one film: ‘Whatever Happened To Baby Jane?’. It is 1961 and Marilyn Monroe is the it girl du jour. Joan found her own project by sending her trusted maid to buy massive amounts of books. Joan gets a director (Molina). Jack Warner (Tucci) is sexist. Bette swears, drinks and harangues her daughter BD (Shipka). This was okay.
“Her unemployment is my long simmering revenge.”
“Anything with ladies on the cover.”
“Yesterday’s it girl.”
“Marilyn Monroe and the vulgarity of her clothing and pictures.”
“With good morals.”
“I can’t play Elvis’ grandmother!”
“An honour to prune Miss Crawford’s bush.”
“Another guest shot on ‘Wagon Train’?”
“My no good father who ran off with a stripper.”
“Welcome to the house that fear built.”
The Other Woman
“I gave you your career back.”
“Early tawdry years.”
“Play the shopgirls and the slatterns.”
“What a dump.”
“Explain? To you?”
“That incontinent cow!”
Why does Oliver have friends considering the appalling way in which he treats them? This show is a glorification of the objectionable Felicity. Lance fawns over Oliver in WTF fashion. Felicity’s dad lurks and everyone overlooks that he is a wanted criminal. Oliver learns that someone on the team will testify against him. Oliver has widespread consternation at being made to pay for his multiple murders. Oliver rants about betrayal and how he should never have trusted the newbies.
Artemis is mentioned. Diggle tells Oliver and Felicity not to spy on Curtis, Dinah and Rene. Oliver is dangerous, hostile, perpetually angry, glowering and embittered. Curtis is eminently forgettable and forgets that he drove Paul away. Oliver forgets that it is because of him that Tommy died. Dinah and Vigilante have purposeless scenes. Oliver views his team in a nefarious light. Black Siren shows up and she beats up Thea and kidnaps Lance. Black Siren is a stick. Cayden James ignores Oliver’s growling.
ARGUS is air-gapped. Oliver shuns Dinah. Oliver suddenly cares about his son. Oliver rants about not trusting Dinah. Diggle doubts Dinah but learns Rene is the snitch. TPTB coerce characters into various situations. Cayden James is a scheming enigma. Oliver is a jackass. Why is Black Siren blonde? Black Siren reveals her dad died.
Oliver goes on about broken trust and throws Rene off the team, twice. Dinah and her lip fillers quits. Rene has his brat back. Curtis quits. Cayden Jams planted a minicam in the lair and he leads a team of evil that includes Black Siren, Ricardo Diaz, Anatoly and Vigilante. Felicity is smug, Oliver is unwaveringly consistent in being a jackass and did Black Siren play Lance? This was okay.
“All that matters to Oliver, at least.”
“No good reasons.”
“I’m not wearing your puke.”
Solo pervs over the innocent du jour. There is another cat and the innocent says she hears voices via her molar. The innocent is manhandled. Bad guys plot. This was not exciting or thought provoking. Killer toys attack. Is the second cat okay? Waverly is a cheapskate. The big guy is Dr Bombay from ‘Bewitched’!
“Essence of cat.”
“If you saw three seedy-looking characters standing on the road. Would you pick them up?”
The Candidate’s Wife Affair
The Come With Me To The Casbah Affair
“No wonder you prefer the blonde one.”
“We could go to Beirut. Oh darling, life there is so bright, so gay.”
The Off-Broadway Affair
“Here’s our illustrious producer Mr David X Machina.”
“A very bad hoodlum element.”
The Concrete Overcoat Affair, part 1