epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Book Review: One Thousand Monsters

Anno Dracula: One Thousand Monsters by Kim Newman
Vampires, ninja turtles and ennui feature in this novel yet it creates no abiding interest or heavyweight gloom. This was woefully ineffective. The heroine has bleak remembrances. Vampires end up in a ghetto in Japan. Cue devious scheming that leads to utterly disastrous interminable goings on. The vampires find ill-favour in this slightly unnecessary book. Characters are sneering, superior, irritating and have apparent contempt for each other. This was wretched and there is no sense of menace and nothing good is about to happen. This was incredibly spectacularly irritating and is all enervating worthiness and pontificating.

Best Lines:
“You could whisper apocalyptic omens to each other.”

“A public accusation, even by a child or the village idiot, was enough to make an elder abandon name, rank and property and depart for a distant land.”

“If she ever sits down, stops scheming and looks at her life, I’ve a feeling Christina might be unhappy with how it has turned out.”

“The shame of my parents.”

“Couldn’t be trusted around your mistress, stableboy or locked desk with your chequebook in it.”

“Would do well not to walk under chandeliers.”
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