epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

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Versailles 2x01 + After The Funeral Reviewed

The Labyrinth
The French drama returns. William of Orange lurks, there is exposition, an orgy, non logic and Louis fawns over his mistress. There are continued poor choices and wilful strangeness and sadism. This was increasingly overwrought and unpromising. No one has amiability. Louis and his smell the fart acting and polyester wig annoys and is charismatically asocial. Where did his son come from? Fabian stomps around, seeing as he never existed, I wonder what will become of him.

When the only tool you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. The Queen broods and snaps at the mistress. There is nudity and Fabian patiently represses rage. This was entirely ill-suited and there are inclinations toward tragedy. A fortune teller plots. Is this show going to do the Affair Of The Poisons? There is a situation of tension and Louis ignores how as an outlaw nation, France is an international pariah. This was mmmm.

Best Lines:
“New rules called etiquette.”

“The principle favourite in the royal household.”

“Very agricultural face.”

“Everybody hates you.”

“Your lineage disowned.”

“Time is no judge of loyalty.”

“Useful social tool.”

“Inevitable tidal wave of doom.”

“Involves hitting things, I’m sure you’d enjoy it immensely.”

~
Poirot: After The Funeral (2005)
Anthony Valentine and Michael Fassbender featured in this adaptation of one of Christie’s better novels. This was okay. A rich man has died and his family gather for the will reading. Are will readings even a thing?  His sister Cora shows up looking and acting and talking like a man in drag. She coos over a doll’s house, everyone smokes and George (Fassbender) is the expected heir. Except he isn’t and there is a new will. There is comedy and then Cora makes a claim about the death and a day later, she is hacked to death.

Poirot is called in to figure out which of the ghastly family members did it. Seemingly the cops do not care about an axe murderer on the loose. Cora’s ex-husband has zero reaction to her death George is recalcitrant. There is suspicion. George drinks, tantrums and berates his mother. He also gets his shirt off. The family are vile, yet another will shows up and there is the big reveal. The killer really can’t act.

Best Lines:
“Toasting fork.”

“Excessive to say the least.”

“Aunt Cora ran off with a penniless Italian painter.”

“He was murdered wasn’t he?”

“Hacked to death by an intruder with a hatchet.”
Tags: hex, poirot, raffles, review
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