epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: Natural Born Killers + The Church + Parkland

Natural Born Killers (1994)
Tom Sizemore, Robert Downey Jnr, Rodney Dangefield, Edie McClurg, Tommy Lee Jones and Marshall Bell feature in this notorious much-blamed film. There are mullets, swearing and this was over-stylised. A reporter hosts a show called ‘American Maniacs’ and hypes up the killing spree of the killer, depraved, twisted lovers. This was not good, it was full of ghastliness and we don’t care about the roots of their resentment. There are no useful corrective moments or unreflective optimism. This was absurd and disingenuous. This was morally vacillating as all characters scorn any moral conventions. This was insufficiently distinct from crap.

Best Lines:
“This is so bad! What did you do?”

“We got a special disliking.”

"You're a media person!"

“That tv scumbag.”

The Church (1990)
This Italian horror has staring, synth music, 17th century nutters, bad dubbing, a prominent 666, witch hunts, bad acting, a goose and a parchment. A church is built on the witch hunt mass grave and bad things happen. This does not add to the horror genre whatsoever. This was disconnected. There is bad ADR, dried up priests, nice music and no clinically precise dread.

Best Lines:
“Examine the cracks later.”

“The black cross of the Teutonic knights.”

“Banished from the dwelling of the righteous.”

“Burning sinners.”

“They appealed a lot to the Nazis.”

“Not one must be allowed to live.”

“Not in a language I can distinguish.”

Parkland (2013)
There is bad acting and an unfocused camera as people stand around talking. People are perpetually confused and there is no social comment as this film covers the day of Kennedy’s assassination and the 3 days after from the perspective of the little people. There is chaos. Nobody knows the POTUS’ blood type and they run around trying to get the Zapruder film developed. There is blood all over the er. Why does a nurse have a huge crucifix in her locker? Oswald’s brother is tormented and feels pain. Tom Welling shows up as a secret service agent and his face doesn’t move. Oswald has a mad mother.

The parallels between the deaths and funerals of JFK and Oswald are hammered home. Oswald’s bother has to ask reporters to act as pallbearers. The priest who gave JFK the last rites, oversees Oswald’s funeral, which didn‘t actually happen. Oswald’s bother also starts filling in the grave by himself. This also stars Zac Efron, Jackie Earle Haley, Colin Hanks, James Badge Dale, Marcia Gay Harden, Ron Livingston, Billy Bob Thornton, Paul Giamatti and Gil Bellows.

Best Lines:
“Nobody wants him.”

“He’s a somebody now.”

“President Kennedy will not need the airplane.”

“Who’s they?”

“I’m no longer asking.”

“I will never be ordinary again.”

“With the Russian wife?”

“Don’t make me negotiate with those people.”

“A respectable display.”

“The kill shot.”

“False speculation.”

“Oswald’s been shot, right now, Jesus Christ - right on live TV.”

“We might get to keep this one.”
“Do we want to?”

“No church’ll do it.”
Tags: movie review, rubicon, smallville

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