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6 TV Reviews

The Children Of Green Knowe (1986) 1x01
BBC1 adapted a ‘classic’ children’s book I’ve never heard of into a 4 part series. There were 5 more books not adapted. Creepy opening credits show a rocking horse and stupid people in ugly clothes mumble. Is a boy an evacuee or what? This was not expertly cast or perfectly crafted. Nobody is quietly desperate and there is no grim darkness just bad lightening. There is a stupid whining child, ghosts and a dollhouse. This was dull.

Best Lines:
“Your poor dead mother’s family.”

“It’s a wonder she isn’t bed ridden.”

~
Outcast 1x05&1x06

The Road Before Us
Kyle and Anderson bother Allison. Megan has no deeper insight. Allison has utterly failed to admit what she did. The police chief ponders. Kyle’s clear and understandable priority is Amber. This ep is not resoundingly acclaimed. There are no messianic performances. Were all of Anderson’s exorcisms for naught? Kyle has no meditative aspect. Allison needs to hear some uncomfortable truths. Why is she denying what she did? She has to know. Nobody exhibits happiness. Allison does conspiratorial glances.

Megan is mean. Sidney lurks. This ep ailed. Kyle’s mess from 1x01 has vanished. Mildred and Sidney talk. What is The Merge? Kyle is an arse. This was a less lauded ep. Allison doesn’t recall what she did or does she? Sidney utters discourse. There is no sense of normality. Kyle and Anderson bother a possessed girl. Allison has a locked perception of her perceived past.

What are the nameless and the numberless? How does Kyle lead them here? Anderson has incredible dedication and uncertainty. Kyle conducts another absurdly strenuous exorcism. Allison attacks Amber again. Amber has a cute bunny nightlight. Why is Kyle such a dick? Anderson is under appreciated by Kyle. Will Allison stop pretending that Kyle has past culpability. Why did Kyle take the blame for her?

Best Lines:
“Nobody can sneak up on a man with a chainsaw.”

“You really want to make that speech wearing that outfit?”

“Limitless grace.”

From The Shadow it Watches
Kyle took the utterly misplaced blame for no good reason.  Anderson has his exorcisms on videotape. Once his position was without question but not now. How many exorcisms has he done? Patricia is offended. Kyle gets an actual job but not for long. Mark is bothered by Lisa the obviously possessed white trash. Anderson is losing it. Kyle is rejected by Allison again. Do TPTB want people to hate her? Patricia asks Kyle for help.

Rachel’s son Austin brats. Lisa sluts it up. Kyle is selfish and this is like ‘Invasion’ but with demons. This was staggering mediocre charmlessness. Allison continues being awful. Megan is mean and I feel cool disinterest for this. Donnie causes more issues. Caleb is possessed and responds forcefully to Kyle. This was well-worn and I’m already tired of Kyle and his defeatist view.

Best Lines:
“Cover yourself, harlot!”

“Nothing’s doing anything.”

“Remember this warning.”

“I don’t need you.”

“Come on, begone!”

“Crazy Kyle Barnes. Rome’s own Boo Radley.”

~
Timeless 1x03

Atomic City
Lucy has a fiancée she doesn’t know. Mason wonders and solider boy (Matt Lanter from ‘Star-Crossed’ and ‘90210’) bores. The gang head to Vegas in 1962. Matt Frewer pops up again. What is he up to? Why does he mutter? Does nobody notices the new waiters running around the hotel? The Rat Pack sing. There is a fight scene.

Flynn wants to change history. The plot centres on Judith Campbell the mob/JFK mistress. Flynn is proud and frightening. Solider boy is not a renowned intellectual and is an awful, terrible person. There is sap and Flynn wants a plutonium core. There is gunfire, yelling and this was dull. Judith has knowingness. I’m trying to maintain interest.

Best Lines:
“It worked in ‘Back To The Future 2.”

“Crack harder.”

“Consider some others.”

“JFK JFK 1 year early.”

“Lots of men want me.”

“Not a lot of people know her name but she’s at the dead centre of 1960s politics.”
“Okay, this is some real Oliver Stone stuff right here.”

“I’ve given up everything for this.”

“It’s not good enough!”

“Any problems?”
“Beside you?”

“How can we be sure we’re on the right side of this?”

~
The Witness For The Prosecution (2016) 1x02
The contentious trial begins. Mrs French was not reasonable or proportionate, which lead to her particularly heinous murder. There is personal bitterness and pitiless testimony. This was sadly a frivolity. Mayhew has sadness, longing and overwrought acting. This was not solemn, emotive or wistful. This was a fearful period and there is no sign of the jazz age. Romanie is bewildering and adored by her audience.

Mayhew indulges in slut shaming which leads to a ferocious reaction. This had a different ending to the film. This verges on the misogynistic as Mayhew discourses. Toby Jones coughs and overacts. Somebody finally notices something. Mayhew becomes rich and famous after the conclusion of the trial. Mayhew attributes blame and the attendant horrors of the aftermath of Mrs French’s murder go on. This has a willingness to linger. Mayhew runs across Leonard Vole again and the prospect of life going on sickens. Things are revealed and there was a pragmatic solution to the case. Mayhew is utterly livid and had a sense of attachment to Leonard and responds forcefully to the reveal. Who is the designated villain here?

Best Lines:
“Has she ever been a prostitute?”

“She doesn’t want me to be happy.”

“A predatory nymphomaniac.”

“She laughed while she did it.”

“To her fancy man, what was my man, what she stole from me.”

“Choose to keep your shame to yourself.”

“There is a penalty for that, expect to pay it.”

“A cat shaped brush for her cat.”

“Good god, what world is this?”

“But love you? I can’t.”

“I don’t forgive you.”

“Please say it back.”

“Lost your career, such as it was.”

“Time has gone by.”

“Vicious scheming bitch lying through her foreign teeth.”

“Get your murdering hands off me!”

“You expect us to be grateful?”

“I wanted to give her money, you wanted her dead.”

“I won’t endure it; you’ll have to go elsewhere for your needs.”

“Then don’t be tiresome Leonard.”

~
Scream Queens 2x10

Drain The Swamp
Narcissism and stupidity reign but there is no filthy wit. The Green Meanie killers run around. Why is Hester free? I’m mystified as to why this deadly scourge hasn’t been axed yet. Nobody suffers judgement.

Best Line:
“’Modern Family’ impacted him deeply.”
Tags: 1980s horror anthologies, bbc-christie, outcast(us), scream queens, timeless
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