epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Book Reviews: Behind The Throne + Misty + Dhampir

Behind The Throne by K.B. Wagers
An obnoxious gunrunner is dragged home to be heir to the Indranan Empire. Why? Because she is the only surviving heir. Cue ‘Firefly’ ripoffs, unnecessary violence, crappy world building, bad writing and obvious bad guys. The heroine needs to be shown how to behave in the context of decent people. Everything she does has disastrous outcomes and one is slightly disturbed by how selfish and volatile she is. She has personal animus for everyone and whines that her privileges were something that was imposed on her. She causes pain and anguish through her disastrous handling of everything. The plot has no depth and there will be a follow up. But I won’t read that. Who cares about the ‘heroine’? Her motives are infuriately vague and she revels in her selfishness and glib dismissal of sense.

There is no discernable deepening in her self actualisation. This was not eloquent. She doesn’t appreciate anything and takes sheer joy in collective violence. I felt only exasperation and increasingly disgruntlement at her lack of propriety and the contrary directions the plot goes. There is no terrific talent here.

Best Lines:
“There are dark dangerous things at work.”

“Know that we didn’t want you back, but you are all we have left. Go see the fruits of your selfishness.”

“Shredded the traitors against the very door they’d been trying to breach.”

“Forever forgotten for your treachery.”

“Sink to such defiled depths as you have.”

Misty - Pat Mills. Malcolm Shaw. John Armstrong. Brian Delaney. Shirley Bellwood
This slim volume reprints 2 (why only 2?) classics from the girls horror comic. Will there be more? Apparently all the original art from girls’ comics was either burnt or used to soak up rain.

A ‘Carrie’ knockoff. A girl named Rosemary is ill-treated by her mother. Social workers and a Judge do not care about physical abuse or deprivation and shrug them off. There are dated pop culture references and evil bullies. People won’t tell each other anything. Wildly inappropriate PE gear is worn. This was originally published in 1978. There are dated fashions and a boy has a toy Dalek. Evil bully Norma and her Joan Jett hairdo plots. Rosemary’s vile mother is vile. A cruel prank is planned. This is an okay story about a cruelly disappointed girl even if the ending is an ass-pull.

Best Lines:
“Sorry, Miss. My candle burned down. I couldn’t see what I was doing.”
“Ha, ha! I heard of saving energy. But that’s ridiculous.”

“Here comes the parkie!”

Oi! Dinner lady! Do you call this dog’s dinner mince?”

“Shame! Shame!”

“Try this caramel! I’ve only licked that!”

“I’m off to my bingo.”
“See you, mum. Don’t nick any of me fags on your way out.”

“It’s an approved school for you,”

The Four Faces Of Eve
A girl in an old fashioned nightie is in a hospital. She doesn’t know who she is, why her parents are weird and why she dreams of other people dying. What happened to Sooty the cat? Why was a tax form lying around? Purposeful malevolence is obvious as is evil will. Who is of good character? Who is Eve? Why can’t she get clear concise information about herself? Eve escapes to a circus and learns what a biomedical horror she is. There is a happy ending and this was okay. It too was from 1978.

Best Lines:
“Typical! People always want to get past you at the interesting bit.”

“Who’s going to miss you? You don’t exist.”

Dhampir by Barb & J.C. Hendee
This 2003 fantasy novel has a badly photoshopped cover, a cod-medieval setting and con-artists as the heroes. This was a dull start to the ‘Noble Dead’ saga and was not memorable and nobody was morally worthy.

Best Line:
“You elven half-wit.”
Tags: book review, comics

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