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Trailers, Quotes and Stuff

‘Underworld: Blood Wars’ trailer
Vampires, leather, darkness, clips of past movies, blue eyes, Charles Dance, Theo James, lycans and the war still drags on. Also Selene seems to make a lycan into a fur coat. Where is her daughter?

Best Line:
“Their final sanctuary.”

‘Don’t Breathe’ TV spot
Yes.

‘Shut In’ trailer
A creepy ghost child bothers Naomi Watts. No.

‘Ozzy & Jack’s World Detour’ promo
No.

‘The Shannara Chronicles’ promo
Yawn.

‘National Treasure’ promo
Maybe.

Best Line:
“The times you came home smelling of whichever women and I’d understand. Well, this is not one of those times.”

‘Seven Year Switch’ promo
It’s ‘Temptation Island’ 2.0.

A ‘Heathers’ TV show?

A ‘Picnic At Hanging Rock’ miniseries?

‘Devious Maids’ cancelled.

How do forgotten Apple Drops dissolve into liquid? That’s disgusting and disturbing.

‘Dr Phil’ Quotes:
“Emotional extortion.”

“Trying to defuse your rage.”

“She hopes you die and when you do she’ll spit on your grave.”

“Controlling psycho bitch.”

“Drug lies.”

“Hey you need to lower your voice.”

“This is what I’m dealing with.”

“Whose idea was that?”

“They were taken away.”

“I withdraw the offer.”

“Full blown meth addict.”

“Violent toxic alcoholic.”

“She told me to kill myself.”

“Fat, worthless and stupid.”

“So toxic.”

“Set the kitchen on fire.”

“High and scared.”

‘The Irish Times’ Quotes:
“The sharing of the genetic narrative.”

“Inflict his anger on his family.”

“Over-rely on external validators.”

“Ovarian madness.”

“Insanity of lactation.”

“Remained constant since that time.”

“Inherently abnormal.”

“Biddable.”

“Less accommodating.”

“Somewhat difficult to translate.”

“Responsive to male demands.”

“Driving the dreaded old woman off the face of the earth forever.”

“The stench from the water renders it unusable.”

“Empathy deficient.”

“Relevant only as what she was in relation to the man who killed her.”

“Deep learning.”

“Barrage of criticism.”

“Must have been greatly loved.

‘Sherlock Holmes: A Game Of Shadows’ Quotes:
“Offered us her hedgehog.”

“Winged vermin.”

“That satanic pony.”

“Will lie for all time.”

~
On ‘Neighbours’: who were the Alessi twins? Brennan lies about bugging the confessional when caught red-handed. When will the slut Paige leave? Brennan is in trouble. Belinda annoys. There are no interesting words. Lauren annoys and seems to have forgotten Amber, Mason and her grandchild. Brennan is deluded. He creates trust gaps. Brennan always sees fishiness and should be reviled.

Paige has a boxing match lined up. Aaron is thick. Brennan, Tyler and Aaron are easy targets for ridicule. Belinda and Charlie are in peril. This was not incredibly significant. The dirty stalker looms. Charlie is a moron. Brennan passes off narrow minded platitudes as wisdom. The stalker has terrible delusions and stabs Brennan (and his cold gleam of self righteousness).

Toadfish, the only lawyer in town advises Tyler and Aaron. Tyler and his manbun is a moron. Tyler and Aaron are utterly unconcerned that their brother has been stabbed. The stalker guy plot seems resolved. Steph whines. Brennan needs a needle decompression. Drab is useless. Paige is jealous of Jack and Amy praying. Elly miscarried. Brennan lies in his sickbed. Paige pouts and could not care less about him being stabbed. Ben hangs out with the dick trap. Piper and Xanthe are friends again. Piper obsesses over Tyler and hates on Paige. Fat cow Terese plots.

Best Lines:
“Smash Paige.”

“12 grand in the red.”

“That woman is the root of all evil.”

“Many a victim has she laid low.”

On ‘Hollyoaks’: Nico was expelled. Where is DS Thorpe the poor man’s Rupert Graves? There is drama involving a backup pen. There are nice new opening credits and Mercedes gets the star slot. DS Armstrong bothers Nico. Jade is a bitch. Peri mouths off to Nancy. This was not fiendishly complicated. There are mentions of Will and Carly. Peri’s baby shows up. Nico does weird crap. This was dubiously tasteful. Tom is sick. Nico poisoned him. Nico is exposed. Getting along isn’t cool anymore. Warren and Ryan (Duncan from Blue) have a connection. Apparently it is going to be revealed that Mac abused James, which explains why not one of the Nightingale clan apart from Marnie act like James is related to them.

Warren berates Sienna. Warren and James have issues. Warren and Ryan have issues. Warren has a son. Warren is disapprovingly tame. Warren’s son shows up. Darren and Nancy blame Sienna. DS Armstrong stares. Ryan and Joel (Warren’s son) look like they’re about to make out. Joel is a priest.

Best Lines:
“He didn’t bury himself in the woods.”

“Her mother can’t be involved.”

“Nico’s stepdad is in prison.”

“Make us eternal sisters.”

“They’ll find the real killer. They always do.”

“They’re turning on you.”

“Deeply flawed.”

“Peace be with you.”
Tags: devious maids, thoughts, trailers
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