Aliens arrive. Jeremy Renner is in this. The alien ship looks like an egg. This looks interesting.
“Define your story beyond your life.”
‘The Love Witch’ trailer
A homage to movies of the past. There is a witch, a creepy house, gaudy outfits, magic, crying, lingerie, sex magic and naked people. There is yelling and more yelling. This looks okay.
‘Swallows and Amazons’ TV spot
‘Lights Out’ TV spot
Who is Dr Orchid?
‘11.22.63’ opening credits
‘Helix’ opening credits
‘Raised By Wolves’ cancelled, heh.
‘Star Trek: Discovery’ is set between ‘Star Trek: Enterprise’ and ‘Star Trek: The Original Series’.
So Thomas Gibson has been fired from ‘Criminal Minds’ which he has been on since 2005.
RIP Barry Jenner and Kenny Baker.
What’s a tercentenary?
I am still doing the LJ tag tidy.
They made ‘A Haunted House 2’?
Raquel Welsh on ‘CSI: Miami’ was all screaming, shouting and bad acting.
I’ll skip ‘The Last Ship’ 3x05.
I won’t review ‘Dark Matter’.
I will review ‘The Last One’, ‘Three Sisters, Three Queens’, ‘Helix’ season 1, ‘Labyrinth’ and the TV version of ‘11.22.63’.
‘Dr Phil’ Quotes:
“Hit in the head with an axe.”
“Things done to you.”
“Inept and ignorant ex wife.”
“Look the other way parenting style.”
“People of questionable character.”
“What’s the big deal?”
“Beyond a negligent parent.”
‘The Irish Times’ Quotes:
“Roaring, shouting and making abusive gestures.”
“Rather pathetic lack of personal completion.”
“It is never, ever nothing.”
“You have an expectation that the other person will anticipate a specific need. They don’t react as you wish.”
“That they will understand your needs without the need for such a paltry vulgarity as language.”
“I learned never to be in a situation where I couldn’t leave when I wanted to.”
“There are no characters now.”
“Who else punched an official and nutted another at a press conference?”
“Hiding the ball from someone else with a similarly pointed stick.”
“Die before your 40th birthday from diseases against which you refuse to immunise.”
“Bottled water was some weird thing for French people.”
“Your liberal statistics.”
“When new duvets didn’t stand up to the toenails of 17-stone Americans.”
“Drying clothes with a hairdryer and a fan heater.”
“Some things decent people ought not to know.”
‘The Last One’ Quotes:
“Essentially useless woman.”
“Rich with implication.”
“Looking, looking, and then with a smile seeing.”
‘The Guardian’ Quotes:
“A pox on faster and more reliable technology.”
“Invented a way to recover teletext pages that are hidden in old VHS recordings.”
“Long-stalled comeback vehicle.”
“Hoping an ending would materialise.”
“Vengeful, hallucinatory meltdown.”
“Measuring his partner’s worth by his own inadequacy.”
“Make his love for her sound like an unimaginable burden.”
“Reminds men of their first wife.”
“Give in to men’s demands.”
“Felt the air freeze.”
“Sitcom husband writ large.”
“A man with only one volume setting who will never admit he is wrong.”
“Also rather unsettling.”
“Famously terrified of dying alone and forgotten.”
“Severing old friendships they will come to regret in the process.”
“Ostensibly at the centre of a rich and busy life, struggling to recall your last meaningful conversation.”
“That nagging feeling of rejection, of not belonging or standing somehow apart from others.”
“Never quite mastering social norms.”
“They pronounce all their consonants and vowels with a lot of enthusiasm.”
“Working-class life is not referred to.”
“A phenomenon he considered ghastly.”
“Those bright carmine cupcakes peddled by overhyped bakeries.”
“Since falling off a nearby church spire.”
“It’s just the definitions of illegality that keep on changing.”
“I’m kinda hoping one falls over.”
‘The Goldbergs’ Quotes:
“That lame wizard band.”
“Yes. Very much.”
“I hated you real bad.”
“This is hurtful.”
‘A Haunted House’ Quotes:
“That’s the hand. Talk to it.”
“You got alter-boyed.”
“Reading on the yard.”
“I had control of the TV for a month.”
“It all looks good at 2 in the morning.”
“Kisha don’t clean.”
‘Sky News’ Quotes:
“There’s no going back.”
“Intentional and concerted effort.”
“God rest her zombie bones.”
“Heroic space stallion.”
“No cheap crack houses for me no more.”
“There’s this moment where a controversial cultural norm begins to shift.”
“The true meaning is gone,”
“Depoliticisation is inevitable as an event goes mainstream.”
“Hunting the tree turkeys.”
“Ones that have not been commercially cultivated since Mayan times.”
“A descendant from something that a Mayan farmer had probably planted centuries ago.”
“The bitterness that can destroy nuance.”
“That future is unknowable to us.”
“It is not one we can control or even imagine.”
“Constant sense of exile.”
“Seems to predate modern travel.”
On ‘Neighbours’: There is glorification of Drab’s crap. Unsupportive Drab is jealous of Ned. This show has an improbability problem. Who’d want Drab? Ned is warned off by Drab. Snakey lurks. A moppet gets attention. Some random Oz singer serenades Lauren with a bad song. Now Drab has nagged her into agreeing to be his third wife. He is no devoted swain. They get a musical montage. Ned broods. Drab has a total lack of brains and his characteristic style of discourse is to be thoughtless. Drab should be almost universally despised for what his did and his crude simulacrum of caring.
“They’re using my gnomes as a toilet.”
“And a nemesis.”
“I jumped to the wrong conclusions again.”
On ‘Hollyoaks’: Cindy lies. Mac acts like a crazed abuser. Ste, Harry and Tony resurface. Ellie yells at Hypnotoad and his dodgy tattoos. Marnie and her bad haircut lurks. Diane and Neeta are still in the opening credits. Nathan, Alfie, Ellie and James are siblings? Why haven’t TPTB fired the new family yet? Hypnotoad is thick. Who bought the garage? Ste lurks being rude and aggressive and yells at people on the street - another of his ill-fated decisions. Ste being a violent loser is increasingly normal for him. Ste will end up tricking.
Amy is to marry Ryan who is played by Duncan James of the boy band Blue. Ellie blames Neeta and burns her clothes. Where is Hilton? Where is Holly? Sonia is loud and annoying. Marnie and Ellie are poison and Mac turns on Neeta again. Alfie does a series of swoons. Will the little git just die? Where is Sinead? Is no-one concerned about her and her baby? Why is Tony so thick? More hideous wallpaper is seen. Where are Peri and Nico? Where is Maxine? Why do Alfie and Jade still have their eyebrows and eyelashes? Why does Ste have no interest in seeing his baby with Sinead?
Ellie is irrationally heated. Marnie is a moral failure. Dirk and Cindy become art forgers. Where are Dodger and Liberty? Ste harasses Amy and Ryan. Ste beats up Ryan. Ste is a constant source of difficulty. Amy makes excuses for him. Ste blames Ryan for his kids not wanting to see him. Ste overlooks his own drug abuse and promiscuity. Leah talks like she is 25. Alfie calls Cindy a slut and screeches. Ellie yells. Alfie collapses. Ste has no self-critical position.
“A drug addled lunatic.”