epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
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Movie Reviews: Star Trek Beyond + Millions + Raising Cain + 13 others

Star Trek Beyond (2016)
This is an improvement after the disconcerting seriousness of the 2nd film. The uniforms have changed and the Enterprise crew are 3 years into their 5 year mission. Kirk is bored, Spock is troubled and they visit the beautiful Yorktown station, meet a new enemy and a new friend and have incoherent space battles. There is humour, drama and action. Spock broods, McCoy carries out worst aid, Sofia Boutella is impressive and there is a lovely homage to TOS. This was good.

Best Line:
“I fail to see how excrement of any kind plays a part.”

~
Millions (1991)
Billy Zane and Lauren Hutton star in this film that seems to have been produced by a former Italian PM. Carol Alt, Alexandra Paul, big jewels, 80s clothes and 80s hair feature. It’s like the pilot of failed prime-time soap. Donald Pleasance is in this. It sounds like Wham! sang the title song. This was all maudlin sentimentality, huge phones, huge rings, overacting and venal, deceitful and dismayed characters. There is dismissive dialogue and a rich man’s relatives have no intention, desire or tradition to get jobs. This film is not unduly concerned with sense. Drama-addict types wander in and out of frame.

Billy Zane swigs from a bottle of scotch and screams. This was okay but does not invoke timeless fascination. There is a decay of morals, obvious discontent, no quiet charisma and the winds of favour change. There are no warm and engaging people, everything is permissible and this has lost all subtlety by two minutes in.

People pose accompanied by moody music. This looks like and has all the depth of a perfume commercial from 1988. This leaves a deep lying sense that it was made as a tax shelter.

Best Lines:
“Take the Concorde out from there.”

“In line for quite a stash.”

“We don’t have time for careful thought.”

“He’s not your husband anymore.”

“Thanks for the skirt.”

“He can find his car at the Nice airport.”

“I wouldn’t put it past you to start a fight.”

~
Raising Cain (1992)
John Lithgow, Lolita Davoidovich and Steven Bauer star in this tale of DID, black humour and various other time draining aspects. There are horrible surprises and this was okay.

~
Bill And Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989)
Poo.

King Kong (2005)
Poo.

Blue Murder At St Trinian’s (1957)
No.

Die Hard (1988)
No.

Honey, I Shrunk The Kids (1989)
No.

Die Hard 2 (1990)
No.

Escape From New York (1981)
Okay.

Footloose (1984)
No.

Firefox (1982)
Okay.

Hellboy (2004)
Okay.

Octopussy (1983)
No.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)
No.

The Transporter (2002)
Poo.
Tags: movie review, star trek
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