epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: The Big Kahuna + Kung Fu Panda + 5 others

The Big Kahuna (1999)
Kevin Spacey, Danny Devito and Peter Facinelli star as three salesmen in a hotel room waiting for an important client. This was not a crisp narrative but was okay. They talk catastrophic consequences and this was all ordinariness, moral certainty and Spacey overacting. They sell industrial lubricants and the two older bitter cases have corrosive emotions and depths of dislike. They wait and await the important customer. This was not utterly distinctive or absolutely mesmerising.

Best Lines:
“The lubricant situation.”

“And assume that she meant that in a favourable vein.”

“Not hospitality closet.”

“Aesthetic wherewithal.”

“Is there a plague coming to wipe us from the globe?”

“Could be constructed as an act of incompetence.”

“Death is bad.”

“I thought maybe it was understood.”

Kung Fu Panda (2008)
A wise tortoise and a fat panda are part of this flashy animated hit computer movie. How is a duck a panda’s father? There is a slutty snake and a Yoda like thing that babbles. Animals and birds wear clothes for no clear reason. The fat panda is declared the dragon warrior and faces a culture of criticism. He has to put in work as paralysing groupthink thinks he is there on a false pretext. The geriatric tortoise has relentless bonhomie. An evil snow leopard lurks. Nobody is dignified, patient or courteous. There is an unending parade of violence and physical daring. The characters have personal sourness and this has no intellectual weight and was just smug and unnecessary.

Best Lines:
“One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it.”

“You’re so much bigger than your action figures.”

“My tenders.”

“I see you have found the sacred Peach Tree Of Heavenly Wisdom.”

“Apply it in combat.”

Flatliners (1990)
Medical students experiment with death and find themselves on their own separate paths to torment as they are haunted by discordant images that instil fear. This careens around wildly and is not a defining horror.

Being John Malkovich (2009)
No, this was an acrid trial.

The Water Babies (1978)
No rough gusto or creative talent here.

The Titfield Thunderbolt (1953)
No to this train film.

Moonraker (1979)
Dumb 007 movie.
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