epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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The Flash 2x23 +Blindspot 1x22+ Unforgotten (2015 - ?) 1x01 +Versailles (2016 - 2018) 1x01 Reviewed

The Race Of His Life
Barry overacts. Zoom overacts. There is fighting and Henry is buried. Iris makes eyes at Barry during the funeral. A total ‘Smallville’ ripoff. Barry is selfish and Joe shoves himself in. Wally wants to be in the cool kids’ gang. Farseeing Cisco cracks wise. Iris is ever useless. Joe is patronising. Barry is at his lowest ebb. Zoom acts cray-cray. Mercury Labs (which was blown up in 2x22) built a pulsar? Jesse scrunches up her face.

Zoom isn’t as good a baddie as Thawne. Everyone looks set to abandon Barry. Snow and Iris and Jesse are useless. Season 1 was preferable to season 2. Season 1 was intrinsically different in that it was fun. Jesse whines. This was not wonderful, fast-paced, gripping, ingenious, edifying, compelling or intriguing. This was not a sparkling narrative. Joe is in peril. This was not compulsive or brilliantly imagined.

Wally mansplains, Zoom does a motive rant and the man in the iron mask turns out to be the real Jay Garrick (John Wesley Shipp) from Earth3. Wally is a prat and Earth1 is the access point to every other Earth but of course. There is bad dialogue. And the time wraiths show up and drag Zoom off to hell or something. Where did Jay get his suit? John Wesley Shipp manages to pull off the Flash suit, a good call back to the 1990 show. Jay puts on the helmet. Harry and Jesse head home. Barry does something selfish and changes the timeline. What hath he wrought? And at what cost?

Best Lines:
“Take from him, what he took from you.”

“With much better acting.”

“You just say no.”

“There’s always more to take.”

“Completely off your rocker sort of way.”

“How many others are there?”

“You’re too angry right now.”

“Work harder.”

“Define good.”


“Got so tired of being the villain.”

“You don’t get to do that!”

“You waited for me for years.”

If Love A Rebel, Death Will Render
A baby is dumped in a bag. Kurt wears a suit. Jane’s gang lie and Mayfair’s ex is involved with them. Jane recalls stuff. Jane’s gang have twisted logic. This is just the start of their not so cunning plans apparently. Jane stands idly by. Everyone seemed to mutually agree to abandon Mayfair and then changed their minds or something.

Kurt’s dad and Jane meet. Tasha and Reade stare. People finally share info. Kurt runs the office. Jane is under review by a burk (Dylan Baker of ‘Trick R Treat’ and ‘Kings’). Mayfair puts it all together. The baby leads to an illegal medical programme which is like ’Never Let Me Go’. Female FBI agents carry the babies to safety. Kurt’s boss (Baker) is recalcitrant and kicks Jane off the team. Renegade status beckons. Something shifty goes on. Mayfair’s character is trashed by people who don’t know. This was a very good episode of a not super-important show.

Kurt’s boss is lonely, bitter and vindictive. Jane fights. Baddies with child-molester names lurk. Jane has a manifest destiny apparently. Kurt and Jane make out. The final scenes are full of massive shocks. Mayfair buzzes like a fridge with a questionable energy rating. Kurt gets Mayfair’s job and is all yelly. Oscar, Jane’s mancandy tries to explain. Kurt’s dad babbles as he dies and reveals to a freaked out Kurt that he did kill Taylor. So who is Jane? There is emotional wreckage all round: I suspected all along that she was not Taylor.

Best Lines:
“I am through listening to you!”

“What did you do to us?”

“Enforce convictions that should never have stood.”

“Buy back your soul.”

“When he finds out what you really are.”

“House arrest is much more dignified.”

“I’m bad for optics.”

“Frame-jobs and faked deaths.”

“Some blanks should stay blank.”

“This isn’t how we wanted it to happen.”

“You did this to me.”

“Who’s under the fort dad?”

Unforgotten (2015 - ?) 1x01
A female cop who is lonely, isolated, unsatisfied and full of unfulfilled negative traits investigates when a skeleton is found in a house built in 1886. A collection of characters that seemingly have nothing to do with the plot or each other are showcased (a Lord, an old dotty couple and their sons, a teacher and a dodgy vicar). A car key found with the bones dates the body to the 1970s and allows the bones at last to be identified. Would so much time and effort really be spent on a cold case? This was interesting and I assume the various characters are the murdered man’s friends/acquaintances. This was unrelenting dourness.

Best Lines:
“Everything we’re had you’ve given to other people.”

Versailles (2016 - 2018) 1x01
It is 1667 and Louis XIV dreams of his mother’s death. His Queen is having a baby and the King trusts nobody and is a spoilt paranoid brat. Louis whines and annoys his brother. This French/Canadian co-production was mediocre. The opening credits are nothings special. Bontemps the king’s valet lurks. Louis decides to turn his father’s hunting lodge into a palace. Musketeers stand around. The Queen whines. Louise is possibly the king’s mistress, the king also fancies his brother’s unloved wife. His brother Philippe has a male lover who is an ass. A woman gets trained in medicine. A dedicated bodyguard hunts down threats to Louis. Philippe mistreats his wife and the Queen has a babythat is obviously not the King’s. This bored.

Best Lines:
“I want to talk to him about mirrors.”

“We must find him. Calmly.”

“The royal merkin.”

“Nobles who pay no tax and yet believe France is theirs, not yours.”

“I want you to dig me a lake.”

“Compose yourself accordingly should you wish it.”
Tags: blindspot, flash, review

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