epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Night Manager 1x02 + Thirteen 1x01 +People v. OJ Simpson 1x03 +Eye Candy 1x01 +iZombe 1x07 Reviewed

The Night Manager 1x03
There is a birthday party with a tacky cake, diamonds and a suicide. This is not dark, troubling material as another carapace of civility cracks. Roper is spiritually desolate. The perpetually opaque Pine is bothered by Roper’s sidekick. Pine has an ex-wife. There is no frequently compelling discourse. Corky aka the sidekick is all snide asides. Pine does shirtless jogging. Corky has no notion of proper de-escalation techniques. This was all banalities. Pine is kept as Roper’s houseboy or something. There is dark mumbling

Why is Angela so obsessed by Roper? Danny is a weird kid. Roper has a secret office called The Citadel. Angela plays the suicide girl’s father Juan. There is no sober truthfulness just politics, corruption, social chaos and petty grievances. Roper is carefully powerful. Danny isn’t Jed’s son. Danny has a mother, elsewhere. Things rapidly escalate. Why does Jed stay in a suffocating relationship full of inconvenient secrets?

Angela is into Enforcement. Roper taunts Jed about her secret son. Jed has a brochure? Did Roper buy her? Roper is a psychopath. There is limitless gloom. What caused the suicide? WTF is going on?

Best Lines:
“Foul smelling creature.”

“Sadly not buggery.”

“That’s what needs to change.”

“That is a deeply odd thing to say.”

“God’s urinal.”

“It’s not my decision.”
“No it isn’t.”

“Bitch! Whore!”

“Where’s everybody?”

“Get in the taxi you bloody whore!”

“Apart from that; how was your day?”

“Go for a manly one.”

Thirteen (2016) 1x01
Part 1 of a 5 part BBCIII drama. Ivy Moxem who was abducted 13 years ago escapes. There are annoying opening credits. Ivy has shaved legs and despite being 26 acts like she is still 13. The cops seem to have awe-inspiring ignorance and stupidity. Ivy has a child prostitute look. Ivy’s father, Angus, left his family for his PA. Ivy is a person into whose acts, utterances and expressions supporters and opponents reach diametrically opposed conclusions. Her sister isn’t unfailingly loyal. The epochal nature of Ivy’s escape attracts press attention. Ivy has weary resignation. Ivy’s sister refuses to acknowledge family responsibility as she has a man now.

It is hinted that Ivy may have had a baby. It is also obvious that she is lying and there is a searing sense of wrongness. There are attendant worries, woes and trouble as Ivy comes home. Her former school head master, Mr Stone, is worried. Her former friends and boyfriend Tim (Aneurin Barnard) are shocked by her return. Ivy has lived with a daily environment of fear. Ivy’s mother wants desperately for things to be as they were.

Ivy sleeps on the floor. The abductor is identified but he is running. Tim visits Ivy with flowers and Ivy’s thought process is unfathomable. Tim is married and hiding it from Ivy. People wonder if Ivy has Stockholm syndrome. The perv worked at Ivy’s school. Ivy’s mother has some connection with Stone. This ends on a cliff-hanger. This was good.

Best Lines:
“There’s never been a case of an escaped captive in the UK. Plenty enough bones. Just nothing living or breathing.”

“I ate from the can. No spoon. You had to earn the right to a spoon. I never did.”

“It’s a safe little place. Well, that’s what they thought until a few years ago.”

“Whatever happened in that house.”

“You won’t let us ask.”

100% Not Guilty
The longevity of this case is amazing with news talk of a mysterious knife. Anyway Shapiro is garrulous. Marcia has dogged determination. There are heated confrontations in court and inexcusable courtroom antics. Jury selection is a tense affair and the teams oversee the selection of a jury that would eventually acquit as a supreme act of revenge. Cochrane spews platitudinous advice. There is no semblance of convention. People wallow in self pity. The ridiculous Lance Ito appears. There are frustrated interchanges. Faye is sleazy and ‘writes’ a book about her murdered friend.

Fred Goldman yells. Marcia has a deathless knack for screwing up. A focus group reveals unpleasant truths. The dignity of the dead is damaged. There is formless acting and a ramshackle plot. Shapiro is dethroned as lead attorney. There is no circumspect graciousness. Darden joins the prosecution. Faye’s book is unnecessary hyperbole. There is black comedy and Shapiro has unusual venom as the Dream Team make a conscious choice not to engage with him. This is a truculent world and deranged comments are made. Shapiro has no convincing good loser face, just piteous boasts. This was okay but with no extreme efficiency.

Best Lines:
“Concede to nothing.”

“Challenge and provocation.”

“We request a special hearing on the hair.”

“In a very non-exploitive way of course.”

“What he did was unspeakable.”

“Maybe try smiling a bit more.”

“He used to hide in the bushes.”

“They’re doing coke on every other page.”

“That’s not true. Okay, that’s true.”

“Lesbian sex, 197.”

Eye Candy (2015) 1x01

A woman’s sister is abducted from a drive-thru that looks all kind of menacing. 3 years later a serial killer lurks and the winsomely perky remaining sister (Victoria Justice) hacks, looks for missing people and is stalked by said serial killer. People die all around her and yet she is never a suspect. Her ex Ben is either a parole officer or a cop. This was lensed by incompetents and interest quickly comes to a shuddering halt. I felt no discernible enthusiasm for this in-authenticity. This was horrible and as it drags on it grows even more repellently and risibly ghastly. I won’t bother with any more, no wonder this was axed. Ben has an annoying declaring style. The heroine has lack of grace. A dating site is called Flirtual. There is bad acting, idiot ball plotting and more death. This was not substantial or insightful.

Best Lines:
“Question for you: is it turned on?”

“The internet, god’s gift to psychopaths.”

“We’re so doomed as a generation.”

“I import cars. Expensive cars.”

Maternity Bites
This has no clear message. A pregnant woman dies, her baby is saved and her awful boyfriend who isn’t collegial or pragmatic is the prime suspect. Liv eats the dead woman’s brains and there is unwatchable cuteness. Major and an annoying reporter bother Clive. Major annoys. Liv’s brother resurfaces and may apply for a job at Meat Cute. Liv and co do nothing about Blaine. Major goes vigilante, gets arrested and ends up in a cell surrounded by bikers. The cop chief zoms out. There is ass pulling plotting and resolution. Liv’s boytoy (Bradley James) shows up. Teryl Rothery plays the dead woman’s mother. Liv finally appreciates her mother and yells at the loser babydaddy. A rat goes zombie. This was okay but Major is seriously minor.

Best Lines:
“The undead walking back in.”

“Trying to hike through a forest in the dark.”
Tags: american crime story, izombie, review, thirteen

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