epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Review: Two Moon Junction (1988)

Into her perfect world comes a perfect stranger - and suddenly nothing is perfect anymore. This silly ‘erotic thriller’ had an unwanted 1995 sequel ‘Return to Two Moon Junction’. A blonde southern girl named April who always wears billowing white dresses (Sherilyn Fenn) is to marry Chad Douglas Fairchild, who can‘t act. Louise Fletcher lurks. Women prance in their underwear.

I’m amazed Fenn has any hair left after that bleach job. There are thick accents, ugly clothes, a man carries an empty birdcage and a low rent carnival comes to town. April jumps into a pool, there are southern mansions, shower scenes, peeping, o faces and a shirtless carnie with a mullet. This is an over-directed largely unnecessary movie. Nobody has a modicum of common sense.

Mullet man is rude to April and this is supposed to be erotic attraction. There is long, steamy gazing, stake pounding, rides and clichés. Mullet man never wears a shirt even at night. He has forceful behaviour as he commits B&E and acts rapey. This was cheese.

Best Lines:
“Her farewell ball.”

“You had your chance but you didn’t run away did you?”
“No I didn’t.”

“Get your dog and go!”

“Get off my sister!”

“I used to be a goddammed elephant tamer!”

“Hold your kinfolk hostage until you do.”

“He your husband?”
“Not yet.”
Tags: movie review, twin peaks

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