epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

Movie Reviews: Dracula + The Rookie + The Great Gatsby

Dracula (1979) The Director’s Cut
Frank Langella, Laurence Olivier, Donald Pleasence and Trevor Eve star in this rather dull adaptation of a play based on the book. Lucy is Dr Seward’s daughter and the vile Harker (Eve) is always sucking face with her. Mina Van Helsing and Lucy wear enormous puffy nightgowns and share the same bed for some reason. Harker casts moral judgements and spews meaningless words. Carfax Abbey is unkempt. The count (Langella and his dark intense eyes and bouffant hair) washes up in a storm and chews on Renfield. Harker has crinkle-nosed Puritanism at Dracula’s 70s hair. Harker is vile and stupid.

This was undeniably imprecise to the book. Mina dies of neck wounds so Van Helsing (Olivier) shows up. Dracula has laser show sex with Lucy in a slipshod scene. Van Helsing has the era’s hostility to foreigners but his ham acting sucks the spontaneity out of every scene he is in. Dracula makes walking into a room steamy stuff. Van Helsing waves garlic at Dracula whilst overacting. Lucy and Dracula run off so the burden falls to the moron brigade to kill the character with the pithiest quotes. The brutal assessment is that this is not good but was Dracula alive at the end so that is why Lucy was smirking?

Best Lines:
The church bells to warn the ships.”

“I dislike mirrors; they are the playthings of man’s vanity.”

“I feel rather cold.”

“Those who have crossed my path have all died and some not pleasantly!”

“How kind of you to call.”

“It is always daylight somewhere on earth.”

“In a century when you are dust, I shall wake.”

The Rookie (1990)
An okay Clint Eastwood and Charlie Sheen buddy movie with unpredictable emotional states and violence.

The Great Gatsby (2013)
A vigorous OTT attack on anything savouring of quality.
Tags: dracula, movie review

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