epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Trailers, Quotes and a 1996 Tape Tale

‘Sicario’ TV spot

‘Doctor Who’ 9x03 promo

‘Identity Thief’ promo

‘Black Mass’ promo

‘Bill’ promo

‘A Walk In The Woods’ promo
Nick Nolte looks like lawn fungus.

Best Line:
“Try not to die.”

‘Up Close & Personal’ (1996) promo
Go away Robert Redford.

‘Chewing Gum’ promo

‘Pan’ TV spot

‘Good Burger’ (1997) promo
This is hell.

‘Care Bears’ ad
They’re back?!?

‘The Burning Zone’ promo
This chill-giver is not plagued with the ordinary.

Best Line:
“Throw the sick ones into the sea!”

‘Star Trek: Voyager’ promo
Swarm! Stupid.

‘Star Trek: Deep Space Nine’ promo
Quark marries a Klingon.

Best Line:
“What does she see in that parasite?”

‘Star Trek: Deep Space Nine’ promo
The 100th episode of DS9.

‘The Burning Zone’ promo
Dumb and very 90s. Or everyone dies, indeed.

‘He Said, She Said’ TV spot
The horrible clothes.

Best Line:
“Sex with me is very good.”

‘Psycho’ promo
Perkins was hot.

‘The Chamber’ promo

‘The Long Kiss Goodnight’ promo
More action.

Best Line:
“Just point and spray.”

Millennium’ promo
Frank Black broods in this over hyped crap.

Best Lines:
“How does he see it?”

‘The X Files’ promo
The infamous ep about the house your parents warned you to stay away from. This has blood, weirdoes and nutters.

‘Needful Things’ trailer
The devil comes to town. Ed Harris emotes excessively. There are fights and taunting. A good trailer but a bad movie.

Best Line:
“You’re disgusting. I like that in a person.”

‘The Intern’ TV spot

Matcha orange raw vibrant nutrition balls - nice.
White Chocolate - okay.
Paleo box - okay.
Galaxy bar - okay.
Salted caramel bar - ugh.
Blue corn tortilla chips - yum.
Gluten free ciabatta and red pesto - yum.
Un-pasteurised blue cheese - yum.

I will review ‘Right Hand Magic’, ‘Left Hand Magic’ and ‘Zeroes’.

I won’t review ‘Once Upon A Time’ 4x14 ‘Unforgiven’ or 4x15 ‘Enter The Dragon’.

The cancelled sitcom ‘Kitchen Confidential’ is 10 years old! 10!

Sam Smith’s Bond theme sucks.

‘Victorious’ Quotes:
“Come eat from my wig!”

“It’s court ordered!”

‘News’ Quotes:
“Have behaved rotten!”

“This group of reformed drug addicts.”

“One years.”

“Cooking soups.”

“12km backlog.”

Speak’ Quote:
“Pen inflamed essays about marginalization and amid, all the shouting, she still falls silent.”

‘Pacific Heights’ Quote:
“Legally severed from his family.”

‘Totally Dublin’ Quotes:
“The horrors that a biotechnically adept future might want to expel.”

“Less conceptually bizarre.”

“Too devoted to wordy surrealism.”

“Avant-garde critical darling.”

“Creatively repressive.”

“A fearful respect for paper.”

“Cancer dances.”

“Overdressed school runs.”

“The Manhattan geisha’s totem of choice, an $8,000 Birkin bag.”

“Misogyny has been internalised as a lifestyle, inflicted by cliques of women upon themselves.”

“With any luck everyone will feel some sense of shame over what they’ve done.”

“Drastic and ill-advised change of tone.”

‘Warehouse 13’ Quote:
“When did you turn into that?”

‘The Irish Times’ Quotes:
“Proper character direction.”

“Lurking doubt.”

“Cows squatting in the centre of the dimly-lit roads at night cause traffic to swerve at the last minute, often with disastrous effect.”

“A propensity to succumb to tears on major public occasions.”

“Discard whatever proves troublesome.”

“Inalienable dignity.”

“If you see something on the ground that’s not yours, don’t pick it up.”

“An outbreak of syphilis in Europe in the 15th century killed an estimated five million people.”

“Climate change in a glass.”

“Wakes up with her face in an ashtray.”

“Grave outrage to moral values.”

“Intensely vulnerable.”

“Generate a profound sense of psychological threat.”

“Can express its confusions and insecurities only in violence.”

“Brutal, cowardly, destructive.”

“Mournful thought.”

“Violent, anarchic, disorder.”

‘Strictly Come Dancing’ Quote:
“Bizarre bottom wiggle thing.”

‘Doctor Who’ Quotes:
“Fell into a nest of vampire monkeys.”

“You keep not dying.”

‘Celebrity Big Brother’ Quote:
“Hag, be quiet.”

‘Dr Phil’ Quotes:
“I’m trapped for life.”

“Recently got married for the 4th time.”

“Unfair in every way.”

“You were breaking things.”

“That disturbing.”

“I will beat your ass!”

“An abusive child.”

“Don’t hit or kick or throw things.”

“Police calm you down.”

“You choose to have that kind of interaction.”

“Antagonistic relation.”

“Eye contact told.”

“I feel left out.”

“Hypersensitive to touch.”

On ‘Hollyoaks’: Ziggy is shirtless. Why hasn’t Diane thrown Ste the freeloader out? Esther’s storyline must have originally been Sinead’s. Tony is an orange homophobe. Cleo is overwhelmingly offensive. TPTB make her look knowing. Jason resurfaces. The Roscoes have an open view of adultery. Ste is lazy and continuing his long and fraught downward spiral. Cleo wastes food. Who is the father of Celine and Cleo?

Diane cops that she is being poisoned and suspects Tony and Tegan. Harry skips school to chase Ste. Harry hurls himself at Ste who acts like Doug and John-Paul never existed. Harry and Ste are unrepentantly awful. Tegan wants Ziggy. What is Sinead doing for money? Filming the Chester 500 in an abandoned warehouse? Peri and Cleo are friends. Peri has perfect GHDed hair for a new mother. Cleo whines about being the invisible one. Ziggy plans a holiday with Tegan - he has no morals. Leela is injured. Pete yells and nobody hears.

Diane does inane witterings. Harry has an abominable compulsion to shag Ste. Leela’s plotline is infuriatingly insubstantial. Ste has forgotten Sinead. Scott is onto Ste. Scott is as scary as dust. Robbie lurks. Where is Lola? Tegan has a pathological gratitude problem and acts like the moral arbiter of Chester. Ste is stupidly annoying. Diane and Tegan fight in the street. Tony is glad Sinead is gone. Tegan is infuriatingly inarticulate. Kyle annoys. Tegan does disjointed ranting. Diane plants a conspicuous camera. Dr S’avage violates medical confidentiality. Scott is the one poisoning Diane!

Best Lines:
“They always come out.”

“Don’t let Tony in!”

“Why does your dad like gays so much?”

“Welcome to the world of secret affairs.”

“Nasty selfish little cow!”

“You can’t treat him like that. He deserves better.”

“You nearly Roger Federered us in the head!”

“He is too good for me.”

“Men flock to us.”

“You that selfish?”

“Smells surprisingly edible.”

“People won’t understand.”

“They’re revolting.”

“Your online slurs.”

“How is the little one anyway?”

On ‘Neighbours’: Why is the obnoxious and awful Susan still friends with Lauren? Where are Mason and Bailey? Naomi doesn’t want to marry Paul. Toadfish is ungrateful. Paul wears a pleather jacket. How many times did Karl cheat on Susan? Susan annoys. Lauren continues to suffer no consequences for her whoring. Paul does a psycho stare at Kyle.

Best Lines:
“Door enforcer.”

“I’ve been proven right.”

“This doesn’t surprise me.”

Cleared out a 1996 tape. It began with a ‘Star Trek: Deep Space Nine’ ep ‘Apocalypse Rising’ in which people do stuff about Odo’s claim that Gowron (Robert O’Reilly) is a changeling. Odo whines. Worf monotones. O’Brien moans. 4 of the DS9 crew go undercover as Klingons but not Dax for some reason. Dukat wears bling. O’Brien and Odo look like morons. Damar broods. There is bad line delivery. Kira says her pregnancy is Bashir’s fault. How meta. There is a twist and this was dull.

Best Line:
We all have our failures and he’s mine.”

Then came an ‘X Files’ ep ‘Herrenvolk’ in which ‘Everything Dies’ says the opening credits. Various blank faced guest stars infuriate. Mulder cries and gets beat up. Mr X dies. Nobody cares.

Then came an ‘American Gothic’ ep ‘A Tree Grows In Trinity’ in which a town near Trinity is named Ascension. Subtle. Caleb runs. Gail annoys. Lucas Buck has 90s hair. Matt is hostile. Selena slinks. 90s clothes are worn and Merlyn is awful. This bored.

Best Lines:
“If you’re looking for the mall, it ain’t built yet.”

“Just cos he killed her don’t mean they can’t share the same worms.”

“I got a shovel at home with your name on it.”

Then there was another ‘DS9’ ep ‘The Ship’ in which the main crew and some red shirts are on a desert planet poking at a crashed Jem’Hadar warship. It’s a great intelligence find and then more Jem’Hadar show up. Sisko claims salvage rights and a siege erupts. A Vorta argues with Sisko. He has no inclination to negotiate. There are bad SFX and a moral message. This was okay.

Best Lines:
“Nobody was alive when this ship hit the planet. Yet it survived the impact.”

“No viewscreen. No chairs.”

“Why do they not come?”

“Very pleased.”
Tags: doctor who, once upon a time, star trek, tape tales, thoughts, trailers, warehouse 13, xfiles

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