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Movie Reviews: Judas Ghost + Red State + Dracula + 14 others

Judas Ghost (2015)
This low budget UK horror is based on the ‘Ghost Finder’ novels by Simon R. Green. A Carnacki Institute team investigate a village hall. They view their jobs with sardonic detachment until they realise there has been a significant breach and they’re accosted by otherworldly forces. This was creepy despite a cast of unknowns and cheap sfx.

This was made in 2012 but not released until now. ‘Blood’ flies, manipulative ghosts pop up and there is raconteur. This falters a bit toward the end but is good, uncompromising, miserabilism done with wet mouthed malice.

Best Lines:
“You shouldn’t think so loudly.”

“They’re not the echoes of the living.”

“No one is to say come in or even think it.”

“Depends on what it’s knocking with.”

“No one comes back, not from where he is now.”

“Bad places make bad ghosts.”

“Even my piss is holy now!”

“Bloody stupid name.”

~
Red State (2011)
One remains unaffected by Kevin Smith who seems stuck in the 90s. His output hasn’t improved since ‘Mallrats’. Three teenage idiots who’ve never heard of the International Male catalogue are pitifully stupid and get abducted by a church of nutters who have an invincible belief in their own righteousness. The nutters have cool anger and there are detrimental consequences all round. This was terrible.

Best Lines:
“Suers not doers.”

“Homo-friendly.”

“Dynamic entry.”

“I subdued the suspect with a head butt.”

“Watch that gay saliva. If it gets on you, it could turn you.”

“Protest that dead Pope’s funeral.”

“God takes pictures too.”

~
Dracula (1958)
The late Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee star in this horror that was rated X back in the day but is tame now. Blood looks like ketchup, women wander around in uplifting night attire, the impeccably wholesome Harker is not shown in an entirely positive light and Dracula runs the gamut from deliciously demonic to ghastly. This spawned numerous sequels despite being unfaithful to the book.

This was melodramatic and the time, era and place are not well evoked. Van Helsing shows up to fight the gloating Dracula. There is a bad child actress in peril and this was not searing and has no tear inducing pathos. Risible women fall for misleading misconceptions. This was overworked and workmanlike. However the final confrontation between Van Helsing and Dracula is good.

Best Lines:
“But it’s horrible!”

“Soon it will be sundown and they will walk again.”

“This vile contagion.”

~
The Curse Of Frankenstein (1957)
The infamous Baron (Peter Cushing) who is dead in the eyes with an aura of self loathing and despair builds a creature (Christopher Lee). His mooching cousin Elizabeth moves in. This was tired and sad.

Best Line:
“I’m quite rich.”

~
Porky’s (1982)
Deleterious

Howard The Duck (1986)
A girl falls for an intergalactic waterfowl. This was almost entirely without merit.

Escape From New York (1981)
Okay.

Paris, Texas (1984)
Okay.

The Cook, The Thief, His wife and Her Lover (1989)
Filthy.

Robocop (1987)
Insensitive camp.

Fatal Attraction (1987)
Terrible.

Harlem Nights (1989)
Nope.

Ruthless People (1986)
No.

Quick Change (1990)
No.

Throw Momma From The Train (1987)
No.

When Harry Met Sally (1989)
I don’t like it.

I Wanna Hold Your Hand (1978)
An okay tale of Beatles fans.
Tags: dracula, movie review
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